Previously: Metalord fought the Cobalt Czar as Twain sought to save Yi Fan from being smothered by a length of electrical cable. And now…

Metalord cursed as he flung another car into the path of a blue beam, then swooped down to hide among the trees lining the small river that ran just past the town. He had so far been unable to even scratch the Czar, and the town was running out of cars to throw at him.

And ducking into the trees hadn’t so much bought him any more time as ended the trees’ time, as a beam of blue light swept through, cutting the trees off mid-trunk as easily as beheading dandelions.

Her face was purple-red above the cables, and Twain was reminded of Veruca Salt, the little girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory…Metalord shot straight up out ot the way of the beam and into clear blue sky again. For a moment, he considered just continuing straight up and then turning back toward home. He had obviously underestimated the value of having, say, Boon there to boost his power and the girls to split the Czar’s attention. He was looking seriously outmatched and he’d basically tried everything. Well, not everything. In fact, now that he thought of it as he turned a tight loop in the air to dodge another blue beam, there were lots of things he hadn’t tried. He’d really only tried the most obvious things, the things that worked 95 percent of the time. But the Czar was obviously above that percentile.

So okay, time to try the crazy stuff. Metalord grinned as he dove for the ground again.

***

Twain unslung the courier bag containing the mask and dropped it with a heavy thud to the ground ten feet away from Ghost Dragon. He stepped forward and felt the air resisting. Another step, and it was like he was passing through some kind of invisible membrane. He wasn’t passing inside Ghost Dragon, necessarily, which would have managed to make this even weirder, but inside his personal space, through air that felt somehow thick and liquid, left his skin tingling as if it were coated in slime.

The air inside was colder by at least ten degrees, not counting wind chill as Twain stood inside a mini-cyclone. He squinted into the blast of dirt whipping against his face.

Yi Fan was right there at his feet, tiny head poking up above a body made thick and rounded by mutiple coils of rubber-wrapped cable thicker than his wrist. Her face was purple-red above the cables, and Twain was reminded of Veruca Salt, the little girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, the one who turned into a big, round blueberry. It was sad that he would never, ever be able to tell her that, not if he ever wanted to sleep with her.

Which, was that the play he was making here? She was beautiful, had been even more beautiful minus her scar and clothes. But was Twain looking for anything more than a way into the City of the Moon?

He grabbed a cable, gave it a test pull and found absolutely no movement. And then Ghost Dragon yelled, “No!” and Twain looked up into glowing blue death.

How will Twain and Yi Fan survive? Don’t miss this week’s climactic episode!

To read from the beginning, click here…

Previously: Twain knocked Digger out as Metalord squared off against the Cobalt Czar. And now…

“You know what? Maybe I’m not such a good guy after all.” Metalord coiled the cable tighter around Yi Fan, who let out another cry that was little more than a squeak. Then he seized some of the wreckage surrounding Ghost Dragon and sent it flying at the Cobalt Czar.

The Czar staggered a step as he was hit from behind by three cars in quick succession. He turned and dodged out of the way of a fourth, suprisingly nimble for such a bulky man. Then he stretched forth his right arm–it was slightly smaller and smoother than his left, its blue hue just a touch lighter, as if it were newer–and a beam of blue radiance shot from his hand. Another two cars were reduced to atoms when the beam touched them, and Metalord barely managed to dodge out of its way. The air stank of ozone and scorched metal.

***

Twain saw the Czar turn firing bolts of azure destruction after the flying Chinese guy, Ghost Dragon forgotten for the moment. Twain threaded his way past piles of brick torn from the destroyed mansion and fallen trees from the estate. He had to free Yi Fan somehow.

The cars weren’t much good as shields, but their explosions certainly did provide a distracting spectacle…As he crept toward where she was held prisoner, he watched the Chinese guy fight the Czar. As he dodged through the air, the Chinese guy threw car after car into the path of the blue beams. None of the cars lasted more than a second, their metal bodies bubbling and dissolving an instant before the gas in the tank exploded. The cars weren’t much good as shields, but their explosions certainly did provide a distracting spectacle to allow the guy to keep evading beams. He tried firing back with lightning of his own, but the Czar shrugged it off easily. The guy was doomed.

Twain was now within 30 feet of Ghost Dragon, who also watched the battle, flickering as if he could barely hang on to existence in this world. If Twain could only get to Yi Fan without him noticing.

“What are you doing?” asked Ghost Dragon without turning around.

“You knew I was here,” Twain said.

“I’m a spirit,” the ghost said. “The form you see here is simply a projection. I don’t see with my eyes, and my back is never turned. You haven’t answered my question.”

“I wanted to free her from the cable,” Twain said.

Ghost Dragon turned his baleful gaze upon Twain. “Then do so. But leave the mask outside.”

Twain looked at the swirling maelstrom that formed Ghost Dragon’s body. He would not need the mask in there, but he realized that a small part of him had thought that perhaps he would simply put the mask on her and dispatch the ghost.

But it wasn’t necessary to his plan, and the ghost might still come in handy against the Czar. Once the Czar was taken care of, Twain would have all the time in the world to exorcise the ghost.

Don’t miss tomorrow’s action-packed episode!

To read from the beginning, click here…

Previously: Dual stand-offs between Metalord and the Cobalt Czar and Twain and Digger. And now…

“Oh for God’s…” Twain said. He felt a seeping warmth from the crystal spreading to his limbs and washing the pain from his face. “Look, I don’t have time for you right now. I’ve got to save a woman who thinks I’m supposed to fall in love with her, then I’ve got to take down the Cobalt Czar. My plate’s kind of full. Besides, your friend’s about to get killed by the Czar, and you don’t stand a chance against me any more. You should be running away now.”

“Give me the mask, and we’ll see what kind of chance I have,” Digger said.

“You want the mask?” Twain said. “Fine.”

And then he was moving, almost as quickly as Digger might have if he’d still had his powers. Twain unslung the bag from over his shoulder as he ran and swung it like a mace. Digger stumbled back, surprised, but couldn’t block in time. The bag holding the mask struck Digger on the side of the head with a sound like a gong.

***

“You said you came to warn me about threat,” the Cobalt Czar said. “What kind of threat could possibly concern me? Other than you threatening to kill my chief of security.”

The bag holding the mask struck Digger on the side of the head with a sound like a gong…Metalord glanced at Ghost Dragon, who growled back at him. “He’s not in any danger as long as he behaves. And my friend was the one with the warning, about some douchebag with a magic cup.”

“A cup?”

“A magic cup,” Metalord clarified. “And the guy also has the power to change clothes.”

The Cobalt Czar stared for a moment, his eyes growing wider as if some growing pressure inside him were forcing them out of their sockets. That pressure next escaped as a burst of air raspberrying between closed lips before the Czar remembered to open his mouth and let the laugh out in its full majesty. It boomed against the damaged buildings nearby, and a moment later, the distant ridge echoed it back, as if it had belatedly gotten the joke. The Czar swiped tears from his eyes as the laugh subsided to a chuckle. “Your friend came a long way to tell me this joke,” the Czar said. “Who is this friend? I want to thank him for the laugh.”

“His name is Digger,” Metalord said, the name punctuated by a distant gong. “But we’re still dealing with us right now.”

The Czar’s chuckle evaporated. “Digger? Here? Where is he? I want to meet him.”

“You can meet him after I kick your ass,” Metalord said. “Let’s do this thing.”

“You want to fight so badly? Then attack me,” the Czar said, looking around. He pointed at Twain, who stood over Digger’s unconscious body. “That can’t be him. He doesn’t have things.”

“I’m the good guy,” Metalord said. “You’re supposed to attack me.”

The Czar continued to scan the surrounding town for any sign of Digger. “I don’t have time for you. Go back to America and play with your little girls.”

I’m not entirely sure, but I don’t think Cole’s going to react too well to that. Be here for the next episode to find out.

To read from the beginning, click here…

Previously: Digger and Twain fought over the mask while Metalord and Ghost Dragon destroyed much of the town in their battle, a battle which was interrupted by the arrival of the Cobalt Czar. And now…

“Tsar Kobalta,” Metalord called happily. “You finally made it.”

Ghost Dragon shrugged off the metallic wreckage piled all around him. “Now you die, invader.”

“Dude, stay out of it,” Metalord said. “This doesn’t even involve you.”

“I will destroy you for your…” Ghost Dragon seemed to flicker out of existence for just a moment. “What have you done?”

“I’m constricting the cable around the woman,” Metalord said. “Kind of like a python. You may not need her to guide your movements, but what if she goes unconscious? Or dies?”

“Threatening to kill one of my subjects?” the Cobalt Czar boomed. “That is not smart move.”

“Hey, they started it,” Metalord said. “I’m just here to see you.”

“Why?”

“Well, my friend wanted to warn you about a threat, but I’m here to finish what was left unresolved between us,” Metalord said.

“What is that?” the Cobalt Czar asked.

With the Czar powerless, all Twain had to do was deal with Digger and Ghost Dragon, and then all good things in life could be his…“We fought to a standstill last time,” Metalord said, “and I know we’ve both been wondering just which of us is really stronger.”

“Standstill?” the Cobalt Czar asked. “I don’t remember.”

“You don’t remember? I’m Metalord, of Defcon 5.”

“Defcon 5?” The Cobalt Czar brightened. “Americans, yes? With the two cute little Japanese girls.”

“That’s right,” Metalord said.

“Yes.” The Czar nodded at the memory. “No standstill. I quit, because I didn’t want to hurt girls.”

“Are you kidding me?” Metalord asked.

***

Twain sat up slowly. His entire face hurt where it had been smacked by the refrigerator. He glanced to the side and saw Digger also slow to get up. His dress had been trashed. The slit in the skirt had been ripped all the way up to his hip, and the seams in the tight waist had split.

Twain heard voices behind him, turned and saw the Cobalt Czar confronting Digger’s Chinese friend, whoever he was. Twain felt the weight of the mask in its courier bag hanging at his side.

Now was his chance. While the Czar was preoccupied with hte magnetic hero, Twain could sneak up on him and slip the mask over his face. With the Czar powerless, all Twain had to do was deal with Digger and Ghost Dragon, and then all good things in life could be his.

But as he took the first step toward his destiny, he was distracted by a strangled cry. Within the whirling filthy maelstrom that raged within Ghost Dragon, he saw Yi Fan bound by snakelike cables, her face contorted in agony. Rage seethed on the ghost’s face, but he held himself in check, almost as if he were afraid. Twain saw the cables tighten around Yi Fan’s body, and she cried out again. The Cobalt Czar would have to wait. Twain had to save Yi Fan.

He took a step toward the ghost, unsure just how to free the girl, when Digger’s voice rang out behind him. “Hey!”

He turned to see Digger rip off the wig knocked askew on his head. “We’re not done yet,” Digger said.

Can Twain save Yi Fan? Will Metalord and the Cobalt Czar find a peaceful way to settle their differences? Are you kidding? Don’t miss the next action-packed episode!

To read from the beginning, click here…

While discussing Howard the Duck last time, I mentioned that the only Marvel Comics character to make it to the big screen previously was Captain America. Given the current release of the latest (and one might even say “Ultimate”) Marvel movie, Joss Whedon’s The Avengers, it might be a good time to revisit the original.

Created in 1941 for Timely Comics by Joe Simon and Jack Kirby, Captain America was Steve Rogers, a scrawny fellow deemed 4-F by the draft board, making him unsuitable for military service (it may seem hard to believe nowadays, when obesity is a major concern, but in the early 40′s, with much of the population rural and just coming out of the Great Depression, the Army’s big problem was finding guys who weren’t underweight). He is given a special serum which turns him into a muscular super-soldier. Given a distinctive stars-and-stripes uniform and a special shield, he fought Nazi menaces like the Red Skull.

So now that we know all about Captain America, let’s sit back and enjoy the serial.  Produced in 1944 by Republic, the studio that produced The Adventures of Captain Marvel, Captain America was the studio’s biggest budget serial (and therefore probably the biggest ever, since Republic had better budgets than Columbia or Universal). And speaking of Captain Marvel, the opening credits look awfully familiar, right down to that creepy-looking guy on the right.

Chapter 1, “The Purple Death,” opens with a man holding a mysterious jeweled scarab as he drives his car. A voice tells him to drive off the road, which he does. His car plunges down a cliff. Next, we see another man, holding an identical scarab, ordered by the voice to jump out his window, which he does. A third man is ordered by the scarab voice to shoot himself in the head.

The radio announcer describes these as the “Purple Death” murders, although he never explains where the name comes from. Maybe the scarabs were purple. One thing the victims all had in common was that they had been members of an archaological expedition to some Mayan ruins, though unlike Captain Marvel, that’s not central to the story.

Next we see crusading D.A. Grant Gardner (Dick Purcell) meeting with the police commissioner. Gardner is a short, no-nonsense kind of guy who says he has a plan to catch the Scarab.

What this has to do with 4-F Steve Rogers taking a super-serum to fight Nazis is beyond me, though it is mentioned that Captain America has helped Gardner catch crooks before. And by this point, it should be obvious that there is no Steve Rogers, no super-serum, no Red Skull. What Republic has done is take their basic “crusading crime-fighter vs. masked villain” storyline and put a Captain America suit on it. No shield, no Bucky, no World War II, no justification for the  ”Captain” designation. Just a hero with a costume fighting a villain with a gimmick, a villain whose identity we’ll probably spend 15 chapters trying to guess.

Cut to the Drummond Museum of Arts and Sciences, where we find Dr. Maldor meeting with Professor Lyman, two of the dwindling numbers of survivors of the ill-fated Mayan expedition.

Dr. Maldor on the left with the badass monocle is played by old veteran Lionel Atwill, who appeared in five of Universal’s Frankenstein movies. His career was destroyed on a morals charge over a rape that occurred during a wild party in his home, and he spent his remaining few years doing serials like this and low-budget quickies. Professor Lyman on the right is played by Frank Reicher, who will forever be known as Captain Englehorn in the original King Kong and Son of Kong.

Unfortunately for Lyman, that cigar is drugged with a substance that makes him highly suggestible. Dr. Maldor is the Scarab, you see, and he wants the plans for Lyman’s Dynamic Vibrator. So much for guessing games. Lyman gives Maldor the combination to his safe, then is sent off to his doom. So long, Captain Englehorn.

Maldor’s sends his thugs to Lyman’s house to steal the plans. He gives them a box of Purple Death bombs, just in case. Wait, the Purple Death is actually a thing? Luckily, before I can think too much about it, the thugs are breaking into the safe in Lyman’s study, where they are confronted by Captain America.

The suit is actually pretty close to the comic book costume. He doesn’t have wings on his head, and the big buccaneer boots are missing along with the shield, but if you look closely, you’ll see the image of the shield on his belt buckle.

There’s a struggle, and Maldor’s chief henchman runs for it as Captain America wrestles with the other henchman for a pistol. It goes off, killing the thug. Captain America calls the commissioner, who calls Gardner’s office and speaks to his hot assistant Gail Richards, who then radios Gardner, who is in fact Captain America.

Captain America has the Purple Death liquid analyzed. It’s an extract from a rare orchid that causes purple blotches on the skin when it kills, hence the name “Purple Death.” Wait, I’m confused. The Purple Death is a purple poison, but the victims in the so-called “Purple Death Murders” died by car crash, jumping out a window, and self-inflicted gunshot wound. Where the hell did the name come from? Seriously, crusading D.A., villain named The Scarab, cursed achaeological expedition, hypnotic gimmicks, truth drugs, death gas… It’s like the script writers cut up a bunch of old scripts and put ‘em on refrigerator magnets then rearranged them. This makes no sense.

So Gail goes around to florist shops to see if anyone recognizes the stuff. Gail finds a shop where the florist takes a step back as soon as he sees the bottle. He gets the drop on her before she can get her gun out of her purse, though. He and his accomplice (one of the thugs from Captain Marvel) plan to kill her with Purple Death juice, but Gardner shows up and gets the drop on the two.  Thug Two grabs Thug One and tries to use him as a hostage, so Gardner shoots him. Thug Two then holds up a beaker of the Purple Death. “Drop that gun or we’ll all die!”

So Gardner plugs him while shoving Gail out the door. He runs out before the gas can kill him. Damn, Gardner’s ruthless.

Now that he has the plans, Dr. Maldor needs to make sure no one else knows the secrets of the Dynamic Vibrator, which means he has to destroy the working model Lyman built with his colleague, Professor Dodge. But first, he has an informant call in a tip to the D.A. to make sure Captain America can’t interfere.

When Captain America shows up to the meeting place, another thug tries to shoot him. He’s played by an uncredited Jay Novello, who went on to a long career in television playing mostly comic roles. He looks pretty tough here, though.

But the moment Captain America waves a fist in his direction, he breaks and confesses that he is just a distraction while the Scarab’s men destroy Dodge’s Dynamic Vibrator. Meanwhile, Gail is at Dodge’s lab, having been sent there to observe Dodge’s demonstration. Apparently, Gardner thought that vibrators were more in her bailiwick.

And by the way, self-pleasuring technology in the 40′s was just a bit unwieldy. This thing fills an entire wall.

As Dodge is demonstrating the vibrator, the Scarab’s thugs enter and lock the group in the vault before they set the vibrator to destroy the building, destroying the vibrator itself in the process. The head thug leaves his henchmen to set the controls, but before they can leave the building, Captain America arrives. In an unintentionally hilarious moment, the two are supposed to say “Captain America” in unison, but one guy obviously forgets his line and mumbles it a second later.

There’s a furious fight. Capain America knocks one guy out the window to his death and knocks out the other before freeing the prisoners from the vault. By this time, the building is shaking pretty fiercely. Captain America says he’ll try to turn off the vibrator (and it looks like he walks over the unconscious thug’s body on the way to the door). But as Cap enters the other room, the building starts to collapse.

And that’s it for Chapter One. The Body Count stands at Scarab: 4 and Captain America: 5. Join us next week for more chapters.

See, the cool thing about the major comics universes was that they were populated by dozens of heroes, any two or three of which could meet at any time (or as many as, say, fifteen if it was team meeting team). But you’d never (AFAIK) had a story which brought all of them together. It was hard enough juggling characters in those JLA-JSA crossovers, let alone bringing in 30-40 heroes or more. And company-wide crossovers were not yet a thing.

So it was pretty unprecedented when in early 1982, a special mini-series titled Marvel Super Hero Contest of Champions debuted, promising “every single super hero on Earth… in the greatest battle of all!”

Putting together a story of this magnitude required some heavy mental firepower, apparently, because the plotting is credited to three men–Mark Gruenwald, Bill Mantlo, and Steven Grant–with the scripting handled by Mantlo. The penciling was not by Sal Buscema, who seemed to be Marvel’s go-to guy when you needed somebody who could draw everybody, or George Perez, who later specialized in exactly this type of story, but a very young John Romita, Jr. with inks by Pablo Marcos. Jim Shooter is credited as editor-in-chief, which will be significant later.

And though the cover might have made an awesome promise, right from the start, you get a sense of how tiresome this story might end up. It opens with the Avengers having a workout in their super-gym when they are suddenly enveloped in a strange red glow and disappear. The same happens to the Soviet Super-Soldiers in a battle with the Red Ghost. And Alpha Flight. And the X-Men. And…

Ten full pages this goes on, with the tenth an extra unwelcome surprise, as it introduces eight new international heroes that we’ve never heard of before. Nine pages of random heroes disappearing mysteriously wasn’t enough? They had to make up new heroes so they could have that magical tenth?

Finally, we’re done with the disappearances and find out where the heroes have been going. And it’s a huge satellite orbiting the Earth. containing literally every super-hero in the world. Which means we have to spend several more pages on introductions.

Holy God, you have no idea how tiresome this gets. Well, if you’ve read the page above, you have some idea. After three pages of this, the folks behind the whole thing finally appear.

The heroes have been chosen to participate in a contest between the Grandmaster and a mysterious Unknown. They will be separated into teams, and each team will attempt to gather the four pieces of the Golden Globe of Life, which will be scattered across the globe.

But not all the heroes. The Grandmaster and Unknown spend a couple of pages picking teams of twelve (which scripter Mantlo then refers to as “two-score,” because math is hard), with the racist proviso that they will only choose homo sapiens–no aliens, Atlanteans, Asgardians, Olympians, Eternals, or others immortals allowed. Although mutants are, apparently, from looking at the final teams.

Two things about this list, Number one, that entire page of ringers that we didn’t recognize before? All eight of them are here. And second, Angel? Seriously? Spider-Man doesn’t make the cut, but we get eight lame cultural caricatures and Angel?

So the contest is now ready to begin. And that’s the end of the first issue. Heroes disappear, heroes get picked into teams, and that’s it.

The second issue begins the actual contest. The globe has been split into four pieces, so each team sends three members to each location. The first bout features Talisman (one of the ringers), Daredevil and Darkstar against Sunfire, Invisible Girl and Iron Fist.

And while I’m all for secondary characters getting some love, there’s just no one to get excited about here. A complete unknown, two minor guest stars from team books, a minor-league martial artist, the lamest member of the Marvel Universe’s founding team (before John Byrne made her kick ass), and Daredevil, who was only interesting when Frank Miller was writing him.

The fight actually gets a little interesting, building to a frantic conclusion, but without any characters to root for, it’s a little like watching those guys who stack cups really fast.

The second bout tries to be more interesting, character-wise, but not by using established popular characters as you might suppose, or even by exploring intriguing opportunities from minor characters. Instead, among the three newbies, it includes the Arabian Knight and the Israeli heroine Sabra, which leads Iron Man to opine…

Yes, that’s right, it’s a Very Special Episode. Aside from Iron Man, the established characters are She-Hulk and Captain Britain, so once more, not a tremendous amount of fan appeal in the mix.

Which leads us to the third and final issue, in which nobody cares, because I didn’t buy it. I mean, seriously, what was there to bring me back? The antagonists were boring, and instead of the “all of  Earth’s heroes” action I was promised on the cover of issue #1, what I had to look forward to was twelve mostly minor-league heroes, including four newbies and Angel. Why waste sixty cents?

But here’s the thing: doesn’t this all look really familiar? No? Maybe you should refresh your memory.

Yes, less than two years later, Marvel did essentially the same thing in Secret Wars, having their most popular heroes mysteriously disappear, only to reappear in a huge space station orbiting an alien sun where they were informed that they would be participating in a contest for the amusement of a cosmic being known as the Beyonder.

Only writer Jim Shooter (remember when I said above that his name would be significant later?) apparently learned from this travesty and made a few big changes: he included the most popular heroes and kept the newbie padding to a minimum, he put villains on the opposing team, so we would have one team to root for, and he made the contest a fight rather than a jumped-up version of Capture the Flag. The resulting series wasn’t very good, but it was better than this.

And yet, as bad as this series was, it not only inspired Secret Wars, but also another really major miniseries that I’ll talk about next time.

Previously: Twain and Digger were fighting over the golden mask, while Metalord and Ghost Dragon were just fighting. And now…

Twain felt a tiny bit of fear worm its way up his throat, but he forced it back down. Digger might not be what he expected, but he wasn’t what Digger expected either. A couple of days ago, he’d beaten three men into the ground with a power he hadn’t suspected he possessed. He did fragment of the ancient form, just to get his mind right, and felt the crystal grow warm against his chest.

Digger scooped up Twain’s dropped baton. “I’m going to enjoy this.”

Twain grinned, and it felt as if the light from the crystal were shining out through his teeth.

***

Metalord magnetically grabbed a long power cable that snaked across three poles. He sent it slithering down to wrap around Ghost Dragon, and amazingly, it held, pinning his arms to his sides. For a moment, at least, until Ghost Dragon turned insubstantial and the cable fell through him.

But Cole wasn’t done. Now that the cable was inside Ghost Dragon, he tightened it around the Chinese woman who was obviously guiding the ghostly giant’s movements. The woman moaned and fell, but lifted from the ground an instant later, hovering inside Ghost Dragon’s translucent body.

Twain smiled. “When we were back in New York, I was the one dressed like a woman, and you had superpowers. Looks like the high-heeled shoe is on the other foot now…”“A valiant effort,” growled the ghost in Mandarin, “but she doesn’t control me. I control her.”

He grew even larger, well over 30 feet tall now, and Cole felt sweat prickle on his skin. He’d fought tougher opponents, but this thing was frightening.

Ghost Dragon charged forward, the woman pinned helpless inside him, the ends of the long cable trailing behind him.

***

Twain moved gently, easily, as if in a dream. The baton came toward him, but he simply relaxed and let it giude him out of its way. And then the world turned blue while a rushing rose in his ears like the roar of a river, and he let that river flow into Digger. When his vision cleared. Digger was on the ground thirty feet away and getting up only slowly.

Twain smiled. “When we were back in New York, I was the one dressed like a woman, and you had superpowers. Looks like the high-heeled shoe is on the other foot now.”

Digger opened his mouth as if to say something petty, but the debris behind him exploded, and Twain barely had a moment to recognize the refrigerator flying straight at him before everything went black.

***

Metalord swooped past Ghost Dragon, dodged a wicked slash, and summoned the trailing cables to his hands. Grasping the naked metal ends in his hands, he sent his strongest current flowing through the cable wrapped around the woman’s body, turning it into a super-powerful electromagnet.

Ghost Dragon snarled and turned to attack, but paused as a car slammed into his face. He batted the car away but was hit by two more. And then the real maelstrom started.

Tin cans flew from cabinets and nails pulled out of walls and furniture. Refrigerators and stoves crashed out through the walls of buildings and flew at the giant apparition. Transformers yanked off of poles in showers of sparks and metal pipes ripped up through the ground like the tentacles of zombie octopi risen from grave.

Ghost Dragon’s eyes widened as he saw a limousine, its driver barely able to leap out in time, lift and fly toward him, slowly turning end over end. But before it could hit, it was destroyed by a beam of blue radiance.

Ghost Dragon and Metalord both turned to look at the source of the beam.

“What the hell is going on here?” boomed the Cobalt Czar.

Yeah, that’s right. Next week, the REAL fight starts. Don’t miss the next exciting chapter of Run, Digger, Run!

To read from the beginning, click here…

Previously: A fight had started between Digger and Metalord and Ghost Dragon and Twain. And now…

Digger turned and saw Twain. “You,” he said.

“Me,” Twain agreed.

“Where’s the mask?” Digger asked.

“Around here somewhere,” Twain said. He pointed at the wreckage of the house. “And by here, I mean there.”

“Help me find it,” Digger said and turned toward the pile of rubble.

“Why should I?” Twain asked.

“Two reasons. Number one, you did this to me. You owe me. And number two…” Digger said, “if you don’t, I will beat the living crap out of you.”

“Funny thing about that,” Twain said as he pulled the spring-steel baton from his pocket and flicked it out to its full length. “You’re not super anymore, which means I should be able to beat you up now.”

“Come on and try,” Digger said, and Twain advanced casually, smiling.

***

Metalord figured he should try the old stand-bys before getting creative. He used his magnetic powers to lift two trucks and flung them down at the ghost. The monster bashed them aside effortlessly, even though he seemed mostly insubstantial to Cole’s eyes. Some sort of selective force field, maybe.

So basic lightning didn’t work, and neither did brute physical force. Metalord needed something more creative and indirect. He hovered about fifty feet up and looked around for inspiration. Power lines caught his eye; he could do something with those, probably.

Digger smiled. “Told you I’m more dangerous without my powers.”There was a flicker of motion at the edge of his peripheral vision, and something hit him hard. He slammed down into a building, crashed through the roof into the interior. He heard screams as the inhabitants fled into the street. He looked out through a dirty shop window at Ghost Dragon, saw one arm retracting to its normal length while the other suddely stretched out toward him.

Metalord launched himself up through the hole in the roof as the giant claw smashed the small shop to bits.  He shot another lightning bolt at his opponent to slow it down. Of course, if it was just some mental energy projection, there was no reason it couldn’t stretch and grow like that. He should have seen that coming. But it meant he couldn’t just hover in place while he waited for a better idea.

Worse, the streets were filling up with people fleeing the buildings where they had been hiding, now that a simple confrontation had turned into a full-blown rampage. Ghost Dragon laughed amid the chaos and panic.

***

Digger leaped in just as Twain was drawing the baton back to swing. The two clashed, throwing punches, elbows, knees. Twain got in one good shot with the baton, a glancing blow aimed at Digger’s head that somehow caught his shoulder, and then he lost the weapon. Digger’s forehead slammed into his jaw, and Twain stumbled back to catch his breath.

This didn’t make sense. Every other time he’d fought Digger, he’d been in complete control, but this was like fighting a completely different person. What was going on here?

Digger smiled. “Told you I’m more dangerous without my powers.”

What can I say? You don’t want to miss the next episode, when things get even crazier.

To read from the beginning, click here…

Previously: Digger was sent into the past and ran into Caveat Maledictor at the Flea Market of Eternity. And now…

Digger turned toward Caveat. “Look, I know none of this will mean anything to you right now, but…”

“Excuse me,” said another Digger as he leapt between them and disappeared as his fingers grasped the crystal.

“What the hell?” Caveat yelled.

“Long story short, I need you to keep this safe,” Digger said. “There’s a master villain from my time called the Cobalt Czar who can’t be allowed to get hold of it.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know, just take it before more of me show up!” Digger handed the lanyard to Caveat. “Thanks.”

“Thanks for what?” Caveat asked.

“For whatever. I gotta’ go.” Digger grasped the crystal and fell into the future. As the world reformed around him, he was sure that the crystal had become broken somehow. Because there had been a house here when he left.

***

Twain moaned and sat up. He saw movement out of the corner of his eye and turned to see Yi Fan walking past him, her hair blowing in an invisible wind. Twain’s skin drew up into terrified gooseflesh as the Ghost Dragon’s leg passed through him, and then the thing was in front of him, bigger than before, a twisted, giant parody of a man. Lightning shot from the house to engulf both the ghost and Yi Fan. They screamed and Ghost Dragon swung his huge arms, knocking down the entire facade of the house.

Ghost Dragon seemed to flow up from the debris. He seemed more solid than before, swirling clouds of dust trapped within the energy vortices that made up his body. Twain could barely make out Yi Fan’s shape inside him…As the masonry fell, Ghost Dragon charged forward into the wreckage. Lightning crackled and Ghost Dragon roared and the walls cracked. Something exploded back toward where Twain imagined the kitchen to be, and then the entire house was collapsing in great billowing clouds of dust.

A figure flew up out of the wreckage, electricity arcing off him in all directions, and then the Ghost Dragon seemed to flow up from the debris. He seemed more solid than before, swirling clouds of dust trapped within the energy vortices that made up his body. Twain could barely make out Yi Fan’s shape inside him as they both roared their fury at the sky and headed off in pursuit of the lightning man.

And then Digger reappeared on the patio, still wearing his curve-hugging Chinese dress.

***

Metalord soared over cramped, narrow streets and looked down at the furious, howling thing below him. He figured this must be the Ghost Dragon that the Chinese super Bu Shou had warned him about.

Despite his horrifying appearance, he had seemed easy enough to beat at first glance. He was obviously some sort of projection formed around the person inside him, whom Cole could barely make out. This made the strategy to beat him fairly straightforward: defeat the person inside and you defeat the projection.

Problem was, the thing was obviously more than just a terrifying image. Whatever it was made of, it absorbed and diffused his lightning bolts, so that only a fraction of the energy actually got through to its intended target. This creature would not be beaten easily.

How will Cole beat Ghost Dragon? Or will Ghost Dragon beat him? And what about Twain and Digger? Don’t miss tomorrow’s thrill-packed episode!

To read from the beginning, click here…

Previously: Metalord tried to capture Twain after Digger was sent on another trip through time, where he met a man in black leather. And now…

“Holy crap!” Digger exclaimed. “Caveat?”

This was too much crazy, too fast. Just a minute ago, he’d been waiting outside a mansion in Mongolia for Twain to show his face again, and now here he was, more than 15 years and half a world away, at a flea market in Berkeley with at least three more versions of himself inside, talking to a younger Caveat Maldictor in an early version of his familiar costume. And his wig was really itchy.

“Are you a man?” Caveat eyed Digger up and down, the tight Chinese dress and the heavy make-up, with obvious distaste. “I know this is Berkeley, but I still didn’t think I’d see one right out on the street.”

“Get over it,” Digger said. “Come to think of it, I need your help.”

“Do you know me?” Caveat’s eyes were confused behind his black mask. “Because I think you’re mixed up. My name isn’t whatever you said a second ago. It’s Dark Justice.”

“Of course it is,” Digger said. “But that’s kind of dull, don’t you think? And a little too cute. ‘Dark’ is awfully close to ‘Derek.’”

Caveat–Digger could never think of him as Dark Justice–turned grim. He grabbed the front of Digger’s dress. “Where did you learn that name?”

“From you,” Digger said. “In the future, when you stopped calling yourself Mister Boring and called yourself Caveat Maledictor.”

“Evildoer beware,” Caveat said, letting Digger go. “I like that. But I can’t use it.”

“Why not?” Digger asked.

Everything you do alters the future…“Because if you learned it from me, but I just now heard it from you, then who actually came up with the name?” Caveat asked. “Won’t it cause some sort of cosmic imbalance if I give myself a name that nobody actually thought up?”

“I don’t know, dude. I’m not a philosopher,” Digger said. “Besides, you could just as easily call it a cosmic inevitability. The universe wants you to use that name, which is why it sent me back here to give it to you.”

“But if I change my name because of information about the future some time traveler, wouldn’t I be changing the timeline? Irrevocably altering the future?”

“Everything you do alters the future,” Digger said. “And frankly, a future with some generic douche named Dark Justice is not the one I want to go back to.”

“You have a point,” Caveat said thoughtfully. “You said you needed my help. What’s that about?”

“There’s something I need you to keep safe,” Digger said. “Come with me.”

They went inside and threaded between booths. Suddenly, a running man came around a corner and nearly collided with Digger. Digger recognized himself, newly come from that motel room where Twain had escaped. “Go,” he whispered to himself.

“What?” the other Digger asked.

Digger grabbed the lanyard  and whipped the crystal up toward his doppelganger’s face. “He’s getting away.”

The other Digger disappeared as the crystal touched his cheek.

“What the hell is going on?” asked Caveat from behind him.

This is turning into kind of a mess. Hope it doesn’t get any more complicated. Be here for the next exciting episode to find out!

To read from the beginning, click here…