As we left off last week in recapping Lewis Coates’s (aka Luigi Cozzi’s) 1979 Italian homage to/rip-off of Star Wars, Stella Star (Caroline Munro) was freezing to death on an icy planet while her longtime partner Acton (Marjoe Gortner) lay dead on the floor of their spaceship.

But Police Robot Elle figured out that he could place Stella in a state of suspended animation, enabling her to survive the deadly cold. And it turns out Acton’s not dead. There’s a really bad fight scene which Acton wins mainly by making goofier faces than Thor…

Okay, as I warned you last week, this is not a superhero film, nor is it based on a comic book. But Starcrash is heavily influenced by Barbarella, a comic that was itself made into a movie starring a young Jane Fonda. Barbarella also starred a young John Phillip Law, who later went on to star in The Golden Voyage of Sinbad, which also featured the sultry star of Starcrash, Caroline Munro. So it’s all connected, see.

Anyway, in mid-1977, a young Italian director named Luigi Cozzi was hired to make a science-fiction film to cash in on the success of Star Wars. One problem: Star Wars hadn’t been released in Europe yet. So Cozzi’s script bears only the slightest resemblance to the storyline of Star Wars, while also drawing heavily on other influences. A lot of other influences.