Super Movies – Captain America, Chapters 6-10

Continuing our look back at Captain America, the 1944 Republic serial that marked the first on-screen appearance of a Marvel Comics character, sort of. As in past serials, I thought I might try a drinking game this week, but was too busy. Maybe next week. Let’s just jump right into the chapter, shall we?

But first, a note about the theme music. Like the script, the music here seems to be an amalgam of other serial themes, a stirring martial tune that starts to inch toward a segue into the story, when suddenly, it turns bombastic and over-the-top with string arpeggios over the horns, before finally fading out to the sting that introduces the recap.

So as Chapter 6, “Vault of Vengeance,” opens, we’re back to the battle in the paper company with Gail trapped under the guillotine blade. Captain America manages to knock out the thug he’s fighting and stop the blade inches away from bisecting his assistant.

Matson reports to Maldor  that Captain America might be Gardner, but the doctor has decided that after five chapters, it’s time to start a new sub-plot. Therefore, he has decided to extort Mr. Henley, the oil magnate, who was also on that ill-fated Mayan expedition. To celebrate his new scheme, Maldor lights his pipe using this cool match-striking gadget on his desk. A villain with style, Maldor is.

Maldor summons Gardner to his office on a flimsy pretext while Matson plants a bug in Gardner’s apartment (and not an inconspicuous one–it’s a radio transmitter the size of an alarm clock that he hides behind some books on the bookshelf). But the plan is foiled when Gail mentions to Gardner that his phone has been busy. Gardner then makes up a fake story about using a rigged case to drop the payoff cash so they can track the Scarab.

Gail makes the drop. While the Scarab’s men are focused on the case, Captain America gets the drop on the overwatching sniper. The stuntman playing the sniper is some kind of acrobat, apparently, because he gets flipped three times and keeps landing on his feet before remembering that he’s supposed fall down.

Finally, Captain America throws the guy off a cliff; he doesn’t land on his feet for that one.

Matson and another thug take the case with the money into a mine, where they take out the money and plan to discard the case down a deep shaft. Captain America attacks, and there’s a furious fight. As has happened a couple times before, Matson kills his own ally, this time by chucking a sledgehammer that hits his buddy in the head; half a point to each side. Captain America ends up getting knocked down a mine shaft and having tons of rocks dropped on him.

In Chapter 7, “Wholesale Destruction,” Cap rolls out of the way at the last moment, surviving the rock. But Matson gets away with the money. The Scarab renews his threats against Henley, while Gardner investigates a used car lot that sold a panel truck to the dead thug. The trail leads to a garage, where Matson and a couple of garage thugs are loading some bottles marked “Nitrogas” onto the truck, now painted to look like a delivery truck for Henley’s company.

This is not Nitrous Oxide, apparently, but supposed to be like nitroglycerin in gas form. Matson and another guy take off in the truck, and moments later, Gardner arrives. The remaining thugs try a half-hearted bluff, but Gardner finds a clue that lets him see right through the ruse. Which is when one of the thugs tries to shoot Gardner in the back, but shoots out a nearby mirror instead. Darn those mirrors! Why must they be so realistic?

There’s a brief gun battle in which we find out that, like The Adventures of Captain Marvel, they’re using pieces of chalk or something to simulate bullet hits.

Gardner kills both guys, then finds the stencil used to paint the oil company name on the truck. He races to the plant where Matson and buddy are pumping Nitrogas into a gas line attached to a furnace that feeds into every building on the plant. When the gas reaches 350 degrees, it will blow up every building in the place.

Captain America enters, and we see something extraordinary. In this adaptation of a WWII hero which has never once mentioned the war, we finally see an acknowledgment of the war in a propaganda poster inside the gas plant.

Captain America attacks! One thing I must say, Republic’s stunt guys are better than Columbia’s. They really seem to try to give each fight a unique flavor. For instance, Matson’s buddy in this fight throws a hard body block, while Matson wings a fire axe at Captain America’s head (managing not to hit his buddy this time).

Cap ends up getting locked in combat with the second thug while Matson once more flees to safety before the building blows up!

So here we are in Chapter 8, “Cremation in the Clouds,” where we see Captain America manage to defeat his foe and turn the valves which shut off the gas to the other buildings before the temperature reaches the critical point and the building blows up. One thing Republic doesn’t do better than Columbia is have more accurate chapter titles. Only one building got blown up. I’d call that “retail destruction,” at best.

Maldor is not happy about this turn of events at all. Not only did Matson fail to accomplish his mission (and score another half-kill of his own man in the process), but Henley has remained unpunished for defying the Scarab. So Maldor orders a Mayan-style hit. They post an assassin with a “Singari blow-gun” on the roof of Gardner’s apartment building (where Henley is being held for safe-keeping).

Henley insists on being allowed to go to his office, so Gardner accompanies him to his car, where the assassin shoots at him. Gardner barely manages to shove Henley out of the way of the dart, then he draws his pistol and shoots the guy on the roof like, 10 stories up. That’s a hell of a shot, especially for the blank Gardner said (back in chapter 2) that he always keeps in the first chamber of his pistol.

Gardner finds the blowgun and takes it to the Drummond Museum to see if Maldor can identify it. He does, but says that Professor Grayson is the real expert. Too bad he’s dead.

But then Grayson’s grandson offers to help if Gail will fly the blowgun out to him. Maldor sends his men to plant a bomb on the plane. Unfortunately for them, the mechanic they’ve tied up manages to break a window and get Gardner’s attention right after Gail has flown away. Gardner gets into a fight with the two mechanics in the hangar. Meanwhile, Gail’s plane blows up.

Until Chapter 9, “Triple Tragedy,” where we see Cap beat the two thugs (amazingly without killing them), then free the mechanic. The mechanic warns Cap about the bomb, and he jumps on the radio to warn Gail. She bails out at the last second and parachutes to safety.

The blowgun is destroyed. But Gardner spreads the rumor that the police have a practice of making exact plaster casts of important pieces of physical evidence, so they still have an exact replica.  This makes Maldor nervous enough that he tries stealing it.

He has Matson and some Australian dude plant a gas booby-trap in Gardner’s apartment, activated by the doorbell. The gas knocks Gardner out long enough for Matson to steal the blowgun and take off, but not before ordering the Australian to off the D.A. Luckily, Gardner was faking, having avoided the gas by breathing from the (hopefully not running) floor furnace. He throws the Australian out the window to his death.

Meanwhile, Gail was staking out Matson’s car and follows him to an old barn. She radios the location to Gardner, but then disobeys his orders by trying to arrest Matson herself. She remembers to pull her pistol out of her purse before confronting Matson, but that doesn’t help when she falls into a pit trap. Matson and friend plan to blow up a bunch of gunpowder to destroy all evidence, but before they can light the powder trail fuse, Cap catches them and attacks.

There’s another furious fight, in which Matson accidentally kicks a dropped blowtorch onto the powder fuse and then runs away while Cap is busy with his random barn thug. Meanwhile, under the floor, Gail watches the smoke as the fuse burns right over the spot where she’s trapped.

The barn explodes. But of course, in Chapter 10, “The Avenging Corpse,” Cap rescues Gail from the trapdoor and they escape together, leaving another unconscious thug to die in the explosion.

Now the story takes another wild turn that feels like it was assembled from pieces of another serial. Turns out Professor Lyman had a brother, who is an inventor. He has invented a device which can resuscitate the dead (though he doesn’t use it on any of the guys the Scarab has killed, including his brother).

Lyman demonstrates his machine to a group of interested parties, including Gardner, Gail and Maldor. Gardner and Maldor eye each other suspiciously).

Lyman uses the device to bring a dead dog back to life. Once it has been successfully demonstrated, Maldor’s men enter to steal the device. Trapped at gunpoint, Gail looks like she’s practicing some sort of mental kill-beam.

Gardner interrupts the men and kills one thug, but the other gets away with the device after a brief car chase in which the guy foils Gardner’s pursuit with hand grenades. Gardner then follows up on a key carried by the dead thug, which leads to a gravel pit that Matson sometimes used as a headquarters. He buries dynamite under the guard’s shack to destroy all evidence, and decides to destroy Cap, too.

But Gail is the one who actually shows up at the shack, while Cap sneaks up on Matson and accomplice with the dynamite plunger. Cap and Matson have a dramatic fight atop some kind of platform at either dusk or dawn, so the fight is all long shadows and silhouettes.

And just when you’re getting the hang of how this works–Cap kills Matson’s assistant thug, Matson runs away–Cap throws Matson off the platform to his death, then uses Matson’s gun to kill the other thug. The dying thug falls forward onto the plunger, and the shack, with Gail inside, is destroyed.

Join us next week for the thrilling conclusion!

Oh yeah, and final body count for this week:

Team America: 9.5

Team Scarab: 1.5 (all half-kills by Matson or by buildings blowing up with unconscious thugs inside)

Captain America is RUTHLESS!

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Week 31.5 – Crushed

Previously: Metalord had finally realized he could not beat the Cobalt Czar. And now…

Twain’s arms and back ached from the strain of pulling the heavy cables bound together by magnetic force. But he was slowly, bit by bit, getting Yi Fan free. Even better, the cable he had already peeled away seemed to have relieved the pressure somewhat, so that Yi Fan could breathe again. If the Czar could keep the Chinese guy busy a few minutes longer, Twain would have her free.

***

“Fine, time for Plan…” Metalord paused and tried to remember what letter he was up to. “Plan Hell With This.”

He reached back toward Ghost Dragon and swung his arm around in a big arc toward the Czar.

***

Twain felt a jerk against the cable, and then the length he had already unpeeled began to zip away, like rope attached to a harpoon embedded in a fleeing whale. Suddenly the cable sprang taut, and Yi Fan was jerked from his grasp. The energy membrane that was Ghost Dragon slipped through him, and then Twain was warm and alone, his ears ringing from the absence of the howling winds.

He saw Yi Fan’s limp body whipped around in an arc, Ghost Dragon howling in outrage as he was dragged along with her. They both slammed into the Cobalt Czar.

[blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”right”]She felt so frail and light in his arms, looked so helpless and innocent. She wasn’t, he knew. She had deliberately killed Biryukov…[/blockquote]Everything became confused. The Czar, suddenly disoriented inside the whirling maelstrom of Ghost Dragon’s body, was made even more so when the length of cable Twain had worked so hard to free up now wrapped around his limbs. He roared in outrage, more insulted than incapacitated, and snapped the cables easily.

By that time, Metalord had taken to the sky and was flying away. The Czar loosed his blue beams from inside Ghost Dragon, whose howl turned into a screech as he dissipated. The beams hit the force field around Metalord, which flickered. He went limp and fell toward the ground.

Twain turned anxiously to check on Yi Fan. Had the Czar’s attack killed her? Was that why the ghost had disappeared?

The Czar barely spared her a glance before leaping off after the fallen Metalord. Twain rushed to Yi Fan’s side and once again grabbed the cable engulfing her. This time it was simply cable–still heavy, but no longer held in place. Twain unwrapped her as quickly as he could, checked her pulse and breathing. Her breathing was shallow, but her pulse was strong under the soft, smooth skin of her neck.

She felt so frail and light in his arms, looked so helpless and innocent. She wasn’t, he knew. She had deliberately killed Biryukov, and he was sure there were other deaths to her name that couldn’t entirely be blamed on the Ghost Dragon. And yet, looking at her face now, relaxed and sleeping, he found he was unable to be afraid of her. He wanted instead to protect and comfort her.

He smoothed back the white streak of hair from her forehead and bent to kiss her.

“What do you think you’re doing?” shouted the Cobalt Czar.

Wow, everything looks pretty bad for everybody at this point, huh? Except for the Czar, I guess. But this surely can’t be the end, can it? Find out next week, in the next exciting chapter of Run, Digger, Run!

To read from the beginning, click here

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Week 31.4 – Crushed

Previously: In battle with the Cobalt Czar, Metalord aimed a long copper coil at his chest and said, “Ever heard of railguns?” And now…

The question was purely rhetorical, for in the moment that the unspoken question mark passed Metalord’s lips, he released the sharpened steel spike he’d been holding. The spike accelerated through the copper coil so quickly, it almost seemed to teleport. A sonic boom might have heralded its departure for New Genesis, if the Czar hadn’t stumbled back from the impact.

The Czar clutched a hand to his right upper chest. Red seeped out from between his fingers, blazing against the blue of his skin.

Cole Chen also stumbled back. The long copper coil fell to the ground. It probably made a noise, but Metalord couldn’t hear it above the whine that filled his ears. He leaned against the crumpled wreckage of what had been a car and looked to the man he’d come to fight.

The Czar pulled his hand away from his chest, and Metalord saw a strange discoloration on his skin. It was gray and flat and shaped something like an alien blossom. The Czar wiped some of the blood away and gripped the thing, and Metalord realized that it was metal. The Czar pulled it out, causing a fresh spurt of blood.

Metalord realized that the metal blossom was the spike he’d fired into the Czar’s chest. It had penetrated the muscle to a depth of only an inch and a half; the rest had just flattened against the Czar’s skin.

[blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”left”]nobody on Earth was more miserable than physicists nowadays, faced with an army of beings the world over who refused to follow the old laws anymore. Physicists were the new Luddites…[/blockquote]The Czar had let a tiny groan escape his lips as he pulled out the spike. Now he fixed Metalord with a baleful glare. His bushy black mustache bristled and his eyes flared a brighter blue as he growled, “Four.”

Metalord was breathing hard after all the exertion, and his gasps threatened to turn into sobs. The Czar was unstoppable. Every desperate gambit had failed: his strongest lightning, the plethora of cars he’d thrown with all his might, the induced heart attack, even the railgun trick that physicists at Lawrence Berkeley had assured him would never work the way he had it designed. Physically impossible, they’d said.

But then, nobody on Earth was more miserable than physicists nowadays, faced with an army of beings the world over who refused to follow the old laws anymore. Physicists were the new Luddites, insisting that the world should retreat to an earlier, simpler time when everyone and everything followed the rules. Usually, Metalord vastly preferred the new order of the world, except when giant blue men were advancing on him, saying, “Three,” and he was too tired to do anything more about it.

Metalord stumbled back a few steps, searching for the strength and inspiration to to take one more shot, anything. The Czar was the toughest man he’d ever met, by far, but he had to have some sort of weakness. He was beatable. He had to be.

But not by him, Metalord realized, at least not today. Unbelievable as it seemed, he had lost this one.

The Czar advanced another step, death glittering in his eyes. “Two.”

I know it’s been a delayed week, but seriously, I think I will have the next episode up by midnight tonight! And you won’t want to miss it!

To read from the beginning, click here

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Week 31.3 – Crushed

Previously: Metalord was trying desperately to find a way to defeat the Cobalt Czar, while Twain worked to save Yi Fan. And now…

“Seven? What happened to eight?” Metalord asked.

“Six,” the Czar explained.

“Fine, Plan H,” Metalord said. With a flick of his fingers, he wrapped a metal blindfold around the Czar’s head.

“Plan H is a blindfold? Pathetic.” The Czar ripped the metal strip from around his eyes, only to find his opponent mere inches away. Metalord placed both hands on the Czar’s bare chest and hit him with a big shock.

This wasn’t like the random shock of lightning, which his uniquely dense skin could disperse. The charge went in and through him, flipping his heart into spasms. The Czar felt his chest clench, grabbed at Metalord with a left arm that had gone suddenly numb. He staggered, fell to a knee, tried to catch breath in a chest that suddenly felt empty. Tears blurred his vision as he grabbed his left fist in his right hand and hit himself hard in the breastbone, once, and then again.

The tension in his chest eased and he could breathe once more. He rose unsteadily to his feet. “Perhaps I underestimated you,” he gasped. “I actually felt that. Five.”

Metalord had stumbled back out of the Czar’s reach. He smiled and tried not to show how his hands had begun to shake. The constant assault had taken a lot out of him. Behind the Czar, the tubing for Metalord’s ultimate attack was finished coiling into its final form. He needed to hurry and use it while he still had the strength to make it work. [blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”right”]“Plan I,” Metalord said, hoping his voice wouldn’t betray how unsteady he felt. “As in, I think you’ll really hate this one…”[/blockquote]

He gestured and once more, a strip of metal wrapped itself over the Czar’s eyes. “Not again,” grumbled the Czar, reaching up to rip the strip from his eyes. “Don’t you have any imagination?”

But as his fingers ripped the covering from his eyes, more metal appeared to cover them up again. He dropped the piece in his hand, even as more metal was clamping itself around his head. He ripped several pieces away to no effect, and felt suddenly sure that every piece he tore off and dropped was merely circling back to join the growing sphere of metal surrounding his head. And once more, he couldn’t breathe, though the panic reaction was less since nothing was actually pushing inside him this time.

He screamed as much as was possible inside the metal mache enclosing his head, and then cut loose with blue beams from his eyes. Metal vaporized and formed a hissing grey mist in the air. Within seconds, the mist had cleared enough that the Czar could see that he had completely disintegrated his foe.

He ripped the rest of the metal shell off his head, at which point he became aware of a loud humming behind him. He turned and saw Metalord standing at the far end of a long cylinder of copper tubing. “You ever heard of railguns?” Metalord asked.

Could this possibly be the weapon that will finally defeat the Czar once and for all? Join us for the next exciting episode!

To read from the beginning, click here

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Week 31.2 – Crushed

Previously: As Digger lay unconscious, Metalord faced the Cobalt Czar alone while Twain tried to free Yi Fan from a constricting cable. And now…

“Hurry,” Twain heard the Ghost Dragon’s voice whisper in the wind that swirled around him. “I’m losing her. I’m fading.”

“Hang on,” Twain said to Yi Fan. He felt the crystal’s power like a warm pulse from the soles of his feet to the top of his head, making him feel stronger, more alive, somehow more there than he ever had before. He laid his hands on the cable and pulled, and amazingly, it moved.

***

The copper tubing had been straightened completely, stretching dozens of feet into the air. As Metalord kept up the barrage of sharp debris, he set the tubing to reforming itself.

The Cobalt Czar stepped forward as if there were no storm of metal debris battering him, as if he were merely walking through rain. “You have no hope of winning, and you are beginning to annoy me. Run while you can. I’m going to count down from ten. Ten…”

Metalord let the useless debris storm drop, summoned some of the harder steel of the compressor motor while trying not to look past the Czar at the tubing still spiraling into a long, thin cylinder like a gun barrel: a tube of tubing. His power over metal wasn’t strictly magnetic, which meant he could do things like reshape the steel motor parts into a very hard, very sharp spike. “Plan E,” he said and launched the spike at the Czar’s heart as hard as he could.

[blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”left”]He moved his hands as if molding clay, directing his mind to rip the spike in two and reform it into two smaller, thicker nodules. Then with an upward flick of his fingers, he sent the two metal ovoids up the Czar’s nostrils. “Plan F!”[/blockquote]The spike struck the Czar’s chest just off dead center and crumpled without penetrating, though it did dent the skin a little. “Nine…”

Metalord stepped back a few paces to give himself room to maneuver as the Czar advanced. He moved his hands as if molding clay, directing his mind to rip the spike in two and reform it into two smaller, thicker nodules. Then with an upward flick of his fingers, he sent the two metal ovoids up the Czar’s nostrils. “Plan F!”

The Czar’s eyes bulged almost as big as his nostrils as his air was cut off. He opened his mouth to inhale, only to have another ball of metal get caught in his trachea. “Plan G!”

The Czar’s entire body seemed to ball up like a fist as his skin darkened almost to purple. His veins distended, his limbs shook as he gathered his strength. He arched back, then threw his head forward as he snorted with the force of a rifle going off. Twin balls of metal ricocheted off the fallen bricks at Metalord’s feet.

Metalord resisted the urge to form barbs on the ball of metal in the Czar’s throat to keep him from coughing it up. After all, he just wanted to beat the guy, not kill him. The Czar took in a huge breath, his face purpling as his neck muscles worked to dislodge the obstruction. Then he spat the stell ball out so hard that it burrowed into the pavement like an artillery shell. He huffed once and growled, “Seven!”

Can anything hurt the Czar? Join us for the next episode as we try to find out.

To read from the beginning, click here

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Week 31.1 – Crushed

Previously: Twain was trying to save Yi Fan from the cable constricting around her body while Metalord had so far been unable to hurt the Cobalt Czar. And now…

Twain stared helplessly at the cable as he tried to find the solution to the problem. If the cable were merely binding her, he could find a way to cut it in one spot and it would automatically loosen. He had nothing to cut it with, however.

There was another possibility, however. Every interaction he had with the crystal made him more and more sure: the crystal was a power source, one that could strengthen him. If he could tap its power to make himself super strong, he might be able to unwrap the cable.

Could he do it in time, though? The big problem was that Metalord’s power controlled every inch of the cable. Getting it to unwrap was just part of the solution; he also had to find a way to make it stay unwrapped. And that’s if he could budge it at all.

He took a deep breath and began the thought exercises the old man had taught him to help him focus his chi.

***

“You’ve lost,” said the Cobalt Czar. “I would kill you now, but you don’t have any pants on. Would be too humiliating, no? Besides, I like those Japanese girls. You go home, tell the girls to come visit me sometime.”

“I haven’t lost, dude,” Metalord said. “I’ve barely started to fight.”

“You’ve lost,” the Czar asserted again. “What can you do? You move metal and shoot lightning. You’ve tried both. Your lightning tickles and the cars bounce off me like gnats. And this freezer? Pathetic. I’m beginning to lose patience, little Chinese. Go while I still let you.”

[blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”right”]What can you do? You move metal and shoot lightning. You’ve tried both. Your lightning tickles and the cars bounce off me like gnats…”[/blockquote]Rage robbed Cole of all thought for a moment. It took him a moment for his thoughts to cool back into words he could give voice to. “Are you kidding me? Don’t you know who I am? I’m not somebody you just dismiss, like I’m not worth your time. I’m Metalord!”

He gestured and the freezer burst apart into its component sections. Shreds of metal skin whirled around both of them, along with long kinked stretches of copper tubing and the component parts of a compressor motor.

The Czar stood impassive, watching the show, perhaps amused but apparently not impressed.

Cole separated out the copper tubing, kept it off behind the Czar as he fashioned it into a possible weapon. He had lots of things he could try before resorting to that. “You think all I can do is throw cars? If I can’t hurt you with force, I can try a thousand cuts.”

The storm of debris shifted, whirled around the Czar, so densely that Metalord could barely make out the blue figure within the maestrom of metal. But even though Metalord was sure he saw the sharp-edged metal fragments strike the Czar multiple times, not a mark appeared on the dictator’s skin.

So he had come up short with blunt force, lightning, the freezer and cuts. It was time for plan–what the hell plan was he up to now? E?

What could Plan E possibly be? Join us for the next exciting episode!

To read from the beginning, click here

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Super Movies – Captain America, Chapters 2-5

Continuing our look back at Captain America’s first screen appearance, the 1944 Republic serial Captain America. At the end of Chapter One, “The Purple Death,” Captain America (also known as crusading district attorney  Grant Gardner) was trapped in a building being shaken to death by Professor Dodge’s Dynamic Vibrator.

In Chapter 2, “Mechanical Executioner,” Captain America says he’ll try to shut down the controls, but as he runs into the room, the building starts coming down so he jumps out the window. Luckily, there’s another building about three feet away with a rooftop right at the level of the floor Captain America is on.

So the building collapses, killing Gail and Professor Dodge since the building is at least 15 stories tall and we see the entire thing come down 25 seconds after Gail and others board the elevator. No way they got out in time.

But the story’s going to say they did, so okay. The mayor and police commissioner think the danger is over with the destruction of the plans for the vibrator with the building collapse (which doesn’t make sense–the Scarab already had a separate set of plans in Chapter 1–but remember, this script has not been written, merely assembled, so the Vibrator is forever forgotten after this).

Gardner, though, tells them that Dodge’s other papers were taken, including plans to the Electronic Firebolt, a device that can cut through steel. But the plans are in code, and only Dodge can decipher it.

Scarab’s got that covered, though. Doctor Maldor uses a ring with a hypno-drug needle to hypnotize Gail, who tells him where Dodge is being held. Maldor sends a couple of guys there to grab the Professor, but they’ll have to hurry, because Gardner and Gail are also headed that way (Gail having just emerged from the trance with no memory of the Scarab).

Gardner leaves Gail outside and goes in to see Dodge, but a gunman gets the drop on him. The guy takes Gardner’s gun and says it’s going to look like suicide, because he’ll have been shot with his own gun.

Of course, the town has already seen a string of suicides that everyone immediately knew were murders, but whatever. The icing on the cake of this extraordinarily improbable plan is that the dude then backs up across the room and shoots him from at least ten feet away with the gun at waist height, probably hitting Gardner in the gut. You know, the way you would shoot yourself if you were committing suicide.

Gardner falls, so the thug puts the gun in his hand. But Gardner’s playing possum. “The first cartridge in my gun is always a blank, to be fired as a warning shot,” he says after getting the drop on the thug. Which sounds neat, but we’ll see if that ever comes up again, won’t we?

Gardner kills the dude after a brief gunfight, then gets the operator to tell him the address of the number the guy called. He leaves Gail to sort out the mess while he races to Wilson’s Feed Barn.

The Scarab’s head thug Matson wants the code key, but Dodge refuses. So Matson has his buddy start a tractor and drive it toward the bound and helpless Dodge as Matson throuws various obstacles in the tractor’s way. It crushes them all spectaularly, which convinces Dodge to cooperate before the tractor gets to him.

Gardner arrives at the barn, but stays outside to change into his Captain America costume, which gives Dodge time to finish telling the thugs the key to the code. Then Captain America enters and attacks the thugs, and we can start to see just why this serial was so expensive. This barn set is huge, so that they have to pan the camera back and forth to keep track of the fight raging across it.

Matson throws a pitchfork, but Captain America spins the other thug around so that he gets it. Credit half a kill to each side. Meanwhile, Professor Dodge has been scooting his chair across the barn to grab a pistol dropped on a hay bale. Just as Matson manages to knock Captain America out, Dodge gets the pistol and starts firing wildly with his arm still tied to the chair.

Matson starts the tractor rolling again and runs out. There’s a nice tracking shot of the tractor rolling toward Captain America’s head. DHOOM!

Welcome to Chapter 3, “Scarlet Shroud.”Captain America wakes up just in time and rolls out of the way. Yawn.

Some time later, the Scarab has been a busy boy, using the Firebolt to rob vaults of priceless treasures all over town. But Gardner has Professor Dodge working on a machine to track the Firebolt when it is used again, and it only needs some special tubes to be fully operational. Gardner will take the control unit to get the tubes installed. But the Scarab has somebody rig his car with some substance that will make his car overheat and then explode when it gets too hot.

Gail spots the guy through the window and races out to warn Gardner. By the time she gets outside, though, Gardner has driven away and the thug has gotten out of his car to grab her or something. But third time’s the charm, as they say. Although the thugs stopped her the last two times she tried this, she pulls her pistol from her purse and plugs the guy.

Damn, girl! Gail takes the thug’s car and tries to catch Gardner.

Gardner spots the tail, though, so he radios the highway patrol to stop the car following him. There’s a bit of rigamarole with the cop stopping Gail then having to DRIVE BACK TO THE ROADSIDE PHONE to get the message radioed to Gardner, but he gets the message in time and dives out of his car just before it goes off a cliff and explodes in mid-air. Pretty cool effect, actually.

So Gardner’s not dead and the control unit’s not destroyed, but the Scarab doesn’t know that. Gardner fakes an article that he was killed in the explosion to lure the Scarab into using the Firebolt, the same way we saw Superman and Batman do all the time. Man, journalists in the serials have absolutely no regard for the truth, huh? Kind of like the mainstream media today.

The Scarab sends his men to rob the vault at the National Platinum Company, where we see that the Firebolt is pretty much a standard carbon arc spotlight with a custom housing and some tubes attached.

Professor Dodge tracks the Firebolt by means of a map of the city that has some contact points attached. He drags a nail across the points until one sets off a light, and Gardner is off.

At the platinum company, the thugs have burned their way into the vault and are taking out boxes helpfully labeled “Platinum.” Captain America sneaks in, and once again, this is a huge set, with a catwalk that he can ambush the thugs from.

There’s another big fight, with the camera panning back and forth across the set. The fight moves up onto the catwalk, and Captain America falls into a big wooden crate with one of the thugs. Matson uses the Firebolt on the crate, and this incredible weapon that can burn through several inches of steel doesn’t penetrate the wood, but does set it on fire.

Before we continue to the next chapter, “Preview of Murder,” let’s pause for a couple of comments. Number one, what exactly was the title “Scarlet Shroud” referring to? The burning crate or the fact that Gardner faked his death? Also please note that either Purcell or the guy doubling him (legendary stuntman Dale Van Sickel) is really paunchy, like 5 months’ pregnant paunchy.

This is not the first scene in the serial that makes it obvious, nor will it be the last.

So okay, Captain America is trapped in the burning crate, but he uses the unconscious thug’s gun to shoot out some corner braces so he can knock down one wall of the thing and get out. Matson gets away, but without the Firebolt or platinum or the Scarab’s robot truck.

Scarab really wants the robot truck back, but first, the reading of Professor Lyman’s will. Professor Dodge gets Lyman’s house, while Dr. Maldor gets Lyman’s share of the Drummond Museum, minus the Mayan Crown Jewels, which Drummond is to sell to finance a new Mayan expedition to find some lost city or other. Maldor’s not happy; he gets to keep something he already has, while losing the most valuable part of the museum’s collection. So he plans to kill Dodge, right after he gets his robot truck back.

Gardner plans to make that easy by sending away the police guards and hiding in the robot van in order to bait a trap for the Scarab. But the Scarab is watching from a TV camera parked inconspicuously a couple of feet away (actually, they claim it’s in the roof of the van, but that’s obviously not the angle the camera is shooting from–sorry, pet peeve), so he orders his men to be ready for Gardner when he arrives. They tie him up, then load the van with high explosive in order to blow Lyman up.

By the time the van is on its way, Gardner has managed to escape his ropes. He jumps one of the thugs, who pulls his pistol. Gardner throws a bucket of something that knocks the guy’s arm aside so he kills his buddy instead. Half a point each again…

There’s a furious fight in the garage, and Van Sickel must have his hat strapped down really tightly, because he gets knocked down, dodges flying tires, gets back up, knocked down again and nearly gets brained with a chair, and the hat never moves. Finally, the guy manages to grab his dropped pistol, with which he is shot while wrestling with Gardner.

Gardner strips off his suit, steals…um…”commandeers” a nearby motorcycle, and races off in pursuit of the robot truck bomb. And is that robot truck the same type that was used as the armored car  in the two Batman serials from Columbia?

No, actually, not even close. Oh well, Captain America rides ahead of the truck, jumps on the roof and gets into the cab. Just as the truck is about to run into the Lyman mansion, Cap smashes the control unit and steers down the side driveway, where the truck crashes into the detached garage. There’s a huge explosion.

Which brings us to Chapter 5, “Blade of Wrath,” where we see that, of course, Captain America jumped out of the truck a moment before it exploded. The next day, Dodge calls Maldor to say he’s leaving for South America right away to get away from the Scarab. He needs the crown jewels tomorrow before the boat leaves so he can hand them off to his dealer.

Maldor comes up with a “simple” plan involving someone named Agent M-32, who will book passage on the steamship and have the company pick up his trunk before departure. The next day, Maldor arrives with the jewels, and something extra: Matson hiding in the trunk of his car. After Maldor has handed the jewels over to Dodge, the steamship truck arrives to pick up Dodge’s baggage. While Maldor’s leaving and Gardner is supervising the delivery men in picking up Dodge’s bags, Matson kills Dodge, takes the jewels, and hides in the empty trunk on the truck.

The plan actually works, at least long enough for Matson to escape before Gardner can stop the truck after discovering the murder. So Gardner and Gail start tracking “John Taylor,” the man who shipped the trunk. He turns out to be Lefty Harper, a small-time crook who has just been found dead. But the trail leads to a box company, where Gail runs into Matson. And once again, she gets her purse grabbed before she can get her gun out. She really needs a holster or something.

Matson threatens to cut off her head with a guillotine paper cutter unless she tells him Captain America’s true identity. Lorna Gray does a good job of looking like she’s suddenly reconsidering her entire career path. And there’s a stylish shot with Matson’s shadow on the blade that looks like the kind of thing Spielberg did in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Wonder if this is one of the serials he specifically watched for inspiration?

Luckily for Gail, she had just called Gardner on the box company’s phone and left a pencil stub under the receiver so the connection stayed open when she hung up. Rather low-tech bug, I must say. But Matson spends so much time demonstrating the guillotine that Captain America is able to arrive before they kill Gail with it.

Unfortunately, during the fight (on another huge set), the guillotine is activated, so Gail watches the blade rise as the fight rages.

Doesn’t look good for her. Be here next week for the next five chapters. Oh yeah, and final body count this week: Team Scarab 3 (counting Dodge, the two henchman half-kills and the dude who is found dead off-screen), Team America 5 (counting the two half-kills and the dude Gail plugged). Captain America will ultimately win this war through attrition, apparently.

 

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Out of the Vault – JLA/Avengers

So a few weeks ago, we looked at Defenders #62-63, in which a large number of heroes came together almost at random to try out for the Defenders in a huge mega-crossover. Next we looked at Marvel Super Hero Contest of Champions, which took that idea, expanded it to include every hero in the world, and shifted the event from an audition to a giant game of Capture the Flag, with the fate of the world at stake. After that came Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars, which took the same set-up as CoC, but used more fan favorite heroes and switched the game to a fight.

At least one more major comic book storyline took that same idea and ran with it, and it was by far the best of the bunch. I’m speaking of the 2003 crossover team-up event of the century, JLA/Avengers (or Avengers/JLA as it was known on even numbered issues). Writer Kurt Busiek and artist George Perez took as inspiration the setup of Contest of Champions and crossed it with Crisis on Infinite Earths, DC’s first universe-wide crossover event (which was also drawn by Perez).

One point to make before we get to the plot: Busiek makes an interesting choice here by choosing to ignore all the previous DC/Marvel cross-overs (such as Superman vs. the Amazing Spider-Man, Batman vs. the Incredible Hulk, and The Uncanny X-Men and the New Teen Titans).

Issue one opens with a couple of universes being destroyed by a mysterious figure who is not the Anti-Monitor. Next we see the Justice League in a frantic pitched battle with Tyrannus, from the Marvel Universe. On the other side of the gap, we see the Avengers fighting Starro, the giant space starfish with mind-control powers. Both sides realize something is wrong; these menaces come from somewhere else, somewhere very different. Flash finds a way to cross over to the Marvel Universe, where he learns it’s a messed-up place. Not long after, the Justice League has an unwelcome intruder: the Grandmaster.

Yes, the guy from Contest of Champions. He has proposed a contest with Krona, the unbelievably powerful dude who has been destroying universes. And the game is, you guessed it, another variation of Capture the Flag. But get a load of the flags.

And at this point, although you might be looking forward to the super-smackdown, you might also feel apprehensive and a little let down. After all, expectations were pretty high for this thing, and the echoes of the lame Contest of Champions slathered over with Shooter-style hype (it’s not just the fate of the world, it’s the fate of the universe… two universes, even) do not lend confidence that the story is going to be anything special.

But then the JLA visit Marvel-world and things get interesting. They are horrified by the darkness of the Marvel universe–the anti-mutant hatred and the idea of a villain like Doctor Doom running his own country. Superman in particular is just offended by the entire place.

Meanwhile, the Avengers visit DC-world and are amazed at how the heroes are idolized, which offends Captain America. As a survivor of World War II, Cap sees the hero-worship as a propaganda machine facilitating the heroes as fascist dictators. So when the Avengers also learn about the contest, it becomes personal.

Which leads into issue number two, in which the JLA and Avengers cross over to the opposite universes to find the items, while summoning reservists to guard the artifacts on their own worlds, which shifts everything into high gear. Busiek manages to combine frantic action with some great character turns, including a hilarious rivalry between Flash and Quicksilver.

Perez also rises to the challenge by not only rendering the characters and action beautifully with his trademark detail, but also doing some really interesting things with symmetrical layouts which complement the theme of parallel universes.

And between the two of them, there’s just scene after scene of fan-wank material, with the Justice League fighting Fin Fang Foom, Wonder Woman fighting Marvel’s Hercules, Darkseid wielding the Infinity Gauntlet (and it’s a sign of how big the scope of this story is that the Infinity Gauntlet thing is dispensed with in two pages), and this huge final battle between the JLA and the Avengers with the centerpiece being an awesome smackdown between Superman and Thor.

The contest looks as if it will end in a draw, but then Captain America, who has been investigating the Grandmaster’s motives with Batman and Atom, orders the Avengers to throw the match. The Grandmaster wins, and Krona… goes nuts. He blasts the Grandmaster and then seizes his prize (the name and location of Galactus) from Grandmaster’s mind. Then he summons Galactus and kicks the living shit out of him and a thousand fans wet their pants in glee.

And the series is only half over.

In issue three, things get seriously weird as the JLA and Avengers experience shifting realities in which frequent crossovers are a constant thing. And because we still haven’t come close to representing nearly every hero who has ever served in either team, the reality shifts seem to push characters through time as well, so that not only do both teams have constantly shifting rosters, but Wally is replaced as Flash by the late Barry Allen, and Kyle Rayner is replaced as Green Lantern by Hal Jordan.

But both sides sense something is wrong, so they investigate, learning that the two universes are being forced together. They track down the wounded Grandmaster who tells them they must defeat Krona to restore the proper reality.

And though the previous issues got some good dramatic mileage out of the DC=Conservative/Marvel=Liberal dichotomy (managing very nicely to ultimately not pick a side), in this issue, shit gets real. Because the climactic confrontation finally picks up some real stakes. And I don’t mean the empty wind of “the fate of two universes depends on you heroes.”

No, see, in order to put things back the way they’re supposed to be, the heroes have to learn the way things are meant to turn out. And it isn’t pretty. Aquaman will lose a hand. Tony Stark will become an alcoholic. The Vision and the Scarlet Witch will lose their children. Batman will lose Jason Todd and have his back broken by Bane. Superman will be killed by Doomsday. Barry Allen will die in the Crisis. Busiek even manages to make good use of the worst character betrayals of both companies, by having Hank Pym discover he will be a wife-beater while Hal Jordan learns he will become a super-villain.

In other words, this isn’t just about facing danger. The heroes have to go into battle knowing that if they win, they will be guaranteed horrible personal tragedies. I expected lots of cool fan wank; I did not expect this level of real drama. Kudos, Busiek.

Which leads to the final issue, with that awesome Perez cover. I’m sorry that I could not get good scans of the entire covers; every cover is a wraparound, but the books are squarebound, meaning I can’t lay the books flat to scan them, and if I scanned the sides separately and tried to paste ’em together, they’d have a missing strip in the middle. But the back covers of issues one through three are just as full of detail, which makes the iconic simplicity of Superman wielding Captain America’s shield and Mjolnir even more effective.

The two teams assault Krona’s headquarters as he is building the power to destroy both universes. Krona defends his fortress with wave after wave of minions, from agents of A.I.M. and Hydra to Darkseid’s para-demons and the Mole Man’s monstrous underground followers. There are also a ton of supervillains.

But that’s not the worst part. The worst part is that reality continues to shift, so that the heroes are disoriented as they battle their way through, with their teammates and costumes constantly changing. Goliath changes to Yellowjacket. Captain America briefly sports his U.S. Agent guise. And Superman not only rocks the mullet for a panel, but also briefly changes to Blue Lightning Superman. And Batman battles Batroc the Leaper. It’s not all classic.

There’s also a neat throwaway gag in which the two Captain Marvels battle side-by-side.

Cool.

In the end, the story ended up being much bigger than I expected, but Busiek kept everything focused and clear. It’s a wonderful job of writing.

And Perez’s art is spectacular, delivering exciting action and cosmic spectacle, while also keeping all the characters not only recognizable but physically distinct from each other. It’s even more impressive when you realize he also inked.

As a complete package, the JLA/Avengers miniseries is in the running for the very best overall storyline in my entire collection.

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Week 30.5 – The Cobalt Czar

Previously: The battle between Metalord and the Cobalt Czar was destroying the Foreign Ghetto, while Twain tried to rescue Yi Fan from the cables smothering her. And now…

Metalord was getting dizzy from all the aerobatics he was having to do to avoid the Cobalt Czar’s destructive rays. He swooped down behind some buildings for a breather, heard energy chewing through brick and wood and steel as he scanned for a particular type of building. It would have been easy to find in America, but they were on the border between Mongolia and Siberia; Western-style restaurants were pretty rare here.

And in the meantime, the Czar was utterly destroying the town. Perhaps Metalord could put a little more caution in him. He launched back into the sky above the buildings to draw the beam up after him, arced back and dove down between the Czar and Ghost Dragon. He heard the ghost shout, “No!” as the beam tracked onto him.

***

Twain felt the crystal burn against his chest as he saw the blue death approaching. His reaction was instinctual, as he focused chi and sent it out in reply. Only instead of making a pear explode like old Ma Ying had done, Twain’s chi came out glowing blue, much like the beam he was countering. The two beams met at the membrane that formed the edge of Ghost Dragon’s personal space.

There was a flash of bright white, and a flare of pain in Twain’s head. The pain caused his blue chi to disappear as suddenly as it had appeared, but it lasted long enough for the Czar’s deadly ray to sweep past. Twain staggered and laid his hands on the cable surrounding Yi Fan once more, not sure he could actually get her out.

***

[blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”right”]Twain felt the crystal burn against his chest as he saw the blue death approaching. His reaction was instinctual, as he focused chi and sent it out in reply…[/blockquote]Having found what he sought, Metalord rose again over the level of the rooftops. The sound of the blue beams had stopped a moment after the Czar had inadvertently struck Ghost Dragon, but the moment he spotted Metalord approaching, the Cobalt Czar lifted his hands to aim once more.

This time, the beam didn’t miss. Radiation coruscated around a magnetic field Metalord erected to divert the energy around him rather than through him. It was not completely effective, however. Metalord’s clothes burned away and his skin sizzled, while the chunk of automobile hide he wore as a breastplate to let him fly blackened and bubbled.

But Metalord did not fall. Rather, he had let himself take the hit in order to distract the Czar from what he towed 50 feet behind him.

Metalord flung his arm forward, and the huge walk-in restaurant freezer hurtled down at the Cobalt Czar, its door wide open like a gaping mouth. The freezer slammed down over the Czar, enveloping him completely.

“Don’t bother trying to burn your way out,” Metalord shouted. “That freezer’s lined with lead. Your beams won’t penetrate.”

A moment later, the wall of the freezer buckled outward. Blue fingers tore through and ripped the wall apart. “Don’t need beams,” said the Czar. He plucked a bit of foam insulation from the sundered wall. “And this is not lead. You watch too many movies.”

How can Metalord hope to defeat the Czar? Join us next week for the next exciting chapter of Run, Digger, Run!

To read from the beginning, click here

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Week 30.4 – The Cobalt Czar

Previously: Metalord fought the Cobalt Czar as Twain sought to save Yi Fan from being smothered by a length of electrical cable. And now…

Metalord cursed as he flung another car into the path of a blue beam, then swooped down to hide among the trees lining the small river that ran just past the town. He had so far been unable to even scratch the Czar, and the town was running out of cars to throw at him.

And ducking into the trees hadn’t so much bought him any more time as ended the trees’ time, as a beam of blue light swept through, cutting the trees off mid-trunk as easily as beheading dandelions.

[blockquote type=”blockquote_quotes” align=”left”]Her face was purple-red above the cables, and Twain was reminded of Veruca Salt, the little girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory…[/blockquote]Metalord shot straight up out ot the way of the beam and into clear blue sky again. For a moment, he considered just continuing straight up and then turning back toward home. He had obviously underestimated the value of having, say, Boon there to boost his power and the girls to split the Czar’s attention. He was looking seriously outmatched and he’d basically tried everything. Well, not everything. In fact, now that he thought of it as he turned a tight loop in the air to dodge another blue beam, there were lots of things he hadn’t tried. He’d really only tried the most obvious things, the things that worked 95 percent of the time. But the Czar was obviously above that percentile.

So okay, time to try the crazy stuff. Metalord grinned as he dove for the ground again.

***

Twain unslung the courier bag containing the mask and dropped it with a heavy thud to the ground ten feet away from Ghost Dragon. He stepped forward and felt the air resisting. Another step, and it was like he was passing through some kind of invisible membrane. He wasn’t passing inside Ghost Dragon, necessarily, which would have managed to make this even weirder, but inside his personal space, through air that felt somehow thick and liquid, left his skin tingling as if it were coated in slime.

The air inside was colder by at least ten degrees, not counting wind chill as Twain stood inside a mini-cyclone. He squinted into the blast of dirt whipping against his face.

Yi Fan was right there at his feet, tiny head poking up above a body made thick and rounded by mutiple coils of rubber-wrapped cable thicker than his wrist. Her face was purple-red above the cables, and Twain was reminded of Veruca Salt, the little girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, the one who turned into a big, round blueberry. It was sad that he would never, ever be able to tell her that, not if he ever wanted to sleep with her.

Which, was that the play he was making here? She was beautiful, had been even more beautiful minus her scar and clothes. But was Twain looking for anything more than a way into the City of the Moon?

He grabbed a cable, gave it a test pull and found absolutely no movement. And then Ghost Dragon yelled, “No!” and Twain looked up into glowing blue death.

How will Twain and Yi Fan survive? Don’t miss this week’s climactic episode!

To read from the beginning, click here

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