Out of the Vault – Elektra: Assassin

Elektra1CoverIt should come as no surprise that Frank Miller became a hot property in the aftermath of his success with Batman: The Dark Knight Returns in 1986. What is often forgotten is that, during the same year when Miller’s redefining take on Batman was being released, he was also working at Marvel, having returned to the character who first brought him to prominence. The first half of the year saw Miller as the writer on Daredevil, joining artist David Mazzuchelli on a story that was meant to tear the character down and virtually reboot him, putting him much more in line with the kind of character Miller thought he should be (a reboot that was undone almost completely by the next writer).

And in the same month that Miller’s final Daredevil issue was published came the first issue of Elektra: Assassin, featuring Daredevil’s former girlfriend who had died in issue #181. Published by Marvel’s prestige Epic Comics imprint, Elektra: Assassin was a sort of prequel, sort of stand-alone non-canon story (much like The Dark Knight Returns) featuring fully painted artwork by newly hot artist Bill Sienkiewicz, fresh from his run on The New Mutants.

The story opens with an unidentified woman in an insane asylum in South America, reflecting on the tragedies of her life: her mother’s murder, her abusive father, her training by a band of ninja led by Daredevil’s mentor Stick, her subsequent corruption and pledge to follow a dark figure known only as the Beast. The Beast leads the ninja clan known as the Hand, whom Elektra later rebels against. Sienkiewicz’s artwork, which had gone through an experimental phase on New Mutants that turned off as many fans as it excited, got even more way out here. Given free reign by Marvel and Miller, Sienkiewicz took a very impressionistic approach. For instance, in the first issue, he illustrates Elektra’s memories in a colorful storybook fashion to contrast with her drab imprisonment in the asylum.

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Elektra ends up escaping from the asylum (it turns out she was just pretending to be held there as part of a plot to kill a South American dictator possessed by the spirit of the Beast). She then ends up in the custody of S.H.I.E.L.D. thanks to agents Garrett and Perry. Garrett is a thoroughly unlikeable, cynical fellow who happens to be something like 90% cyborg, but he has a buried streak of idealism underneath. Perry, on the other hand, is simply a psychopath.

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Elektra kills Perry and escapes with Garrett, who becomes her semi-unwilling partner in a quest to stop American presidential candidate Ken Wind. Ken Wind, you see, has been taken over by the Beast, who plans to start a nuclear holocaust once Wind is elected President. In order to save the world, Elektra and Garrett must battle not only the Beast and his Hand minions, including psychotic ex-partner Perry resurrected as a nearly invincible cyborg,, but also the forces of S.H.I.E.L.D. led by Nick Fury and agent Chastity McBride. Sienkiewicz depicts Wind as a Robert Kennedy lookalike, with his photocopied face never changing expression and always facing the reader, even when his back is turned.

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At the time, Miller’s fragmentary stream-of-consciousness narration and satirical storyline combined with Sienkiewicz’s boldly experimental artwork seemed daring and dangerous. Looking back at it now, it seems as if it’s the first step in Miller’s subsequent downward spiral. Most of the problems of Miller’s later work–unpleasant characters, confusing storytelling, muddled political satire–are present here. I was willing to overlook them then, because The Dark Knight Returns had seemed so bold, and Miller was experimenting, searching for his path. I figured he would continue to build on his strengths and work through his weaknesses. I had no idea then that his later work would continue to magnify the things I liked least about Elektra: Assassin.

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Metatronic Chapter Nine: Musselman

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CHAPTER NINE

MUSSELMAN

 

His hands were soft on her skin. Lina had always liked his hands. Most of the men she was with, their hands were so rough and chapped from manual labor and rough living that she had to pick her wardrobe with care to avoid runs and snags. Alan Musselman had a thick callus on the pad of one thumb for some reason, but otherwise, his hands were soft.

He stopped kissing her long enough to strip off his khakis and underwear in one movement, knelt on the bed above her naked, his erection straining toward her like a tree branch growing toward the sun. Her clothes had long since been peeled away, and he bent to nudge her bare thighs apart. She stopped him with a hand on his chest.

“Sweetie, you know I don’t do anything until you’re clean,” she said.

“I know,” he said, panting, “but I just…”

“Go wash up then, and do a good job,” she said. She smiled wickedly. “You know I’ll make it worth the wait.”

He knelt and sniffed at her crotch, gave a tiny whine of urgent need, then climbed off the motel room bed and stumbled into the restroom, his erection bobbing.

Lina rolled lithely off the bed as the door closed. She crept quickly but silently to her purse, pulled out her cell phone and a set of ear buds. She paged through the menus to the special application Haziz had installed, plugged in the ear buds and moved to Alan’s clothes. Instead of putting the buds in her ears, she swept them over his pants pockets, was rewarded almost instantaneously with a beep from the phone.

She heard the water stop running. She dropped the phone back in her purse and scrambled onto the bed again as the door opened. Alan’s face betrayed a moment of confusion at what she had been doing, but it was forgotten as she spread her legs to play with herself. “Hurry up and help me,” she moaned, and he leapt onto the bed in response.

*****

Even though they had covered the walls with curtains like bland tapestries, there was a limit to what they could do. In spite of the visual distraction, Nathan Gentle could still smell mildew and old dust, a smell that only intensified when the door opened and Keck leaned in. “She’s back.”

“About time,” Gentle responded. He left his suite and walked with Keck down the hallway toward the elevators. The hallway had been decorated in the tasteful blandness of a higher-end business hotel, but the textured sand-colored walls and muted abstract giclee prints just highlighted the cracked walls and black splotches of mold. Gentle stepped over the tears in the carpet that exposed bare concrete floor.

“Were there any problems?” Gentle asked.

“She didn’t say.”

“Where is she now?” Gentle asked.

Keck shrugged his narrow shoulders. “In with Haziz.”

“Already? Damn it,” Gentle muttered. “I’d hoped to talk to her before she got to him.”

They passed the elevators covered with caution tape and entered a door marked EMPLOYEES ONLY. Once in the maintenance areas of the hotel, the contrast between the intended décor and recent decay was lessened; the owners had never cared about making these parts of the building look good. They went down a set of fire stairs and stopped before a steel door. Keck punched in a code and the door unlocked with a click.

They passed rooms that had once held massive washers and dryers, but were now crowded with maps and surveillance photographs. They continued toward Haziz’s workshop near the end of the corridor. Gentle heard Lina’s voice saying, “I’m not the one you have to convince. But for what it’s worth…”

The voice cut off as they drew nearer and entered the room.

Lina turned and smiled at him, her tight dancer’s body angled for its best effect. She always seemed to be posing for a photographer who wasn’t there. Even her hair, blond highlights over black undertones, always framed her face perfectly, as if it knew it would be on camera at any second. She lived as if she starred in a reality show that only she was aware of. “Hi, Nathan.”

“Did you get it?”

Haziz, sitting at a long work bench piled high with computer equipment and electronics tools, turned and held up the cell phone. Servos whirred as the tiny camera that replaced his missing left eye tracked toward Gentle.”It’s here. I haven’t looked at it yet, but the capture seems to have been successful.”

“How soon can you have it ready?” Gentle asked.

“By morning, if the data’s good.”

“Good,” Gentle said as Lina pressed herself warmly against his side. He unconsciously wrapped an arm around her waist. He looked down into her green eyes. “Who’s the one he has to convince?”

“What, baby?” Lina sitffened. Her eyes, wide with poorly-feigned innocence, were so beautiful that he found himself feeling guilty that he didn’t believe her. Life would be so much easier if he could.

“You said you’re not the one he has to convince,” Gentle said, and she squirmed slightly against him.

“We shouldn’t be screwing around with just the launch,” Haziz said bluntly. “Blow up the rocket, they’ll just build another one. But kill the people building the rocket…”

“They’ll just hire more,” Gentle said. Even though Haziz’s face—the left side covered with scar tissue where it hadn’t been cut away to make room for the camera housing, cables snaking under the skin and down his neck—was repulsive, Gentle forced himself to meet the man’s eyes without flinching. “We’ve already been over this. People are cheaper than rockets. The only way we stop this for good is to make it so expensive that they know they’ll never see a profit.”

“But can we do that?” Haziz asked. “Stopping this one launch is already hard enough. And every security loophole we exploit will get closed the next time. How many launches will we have to stop before they call it quits? Killing people is easy, and people get scared, where machines don’t. Before long, people would be too scared to take the job, no matter how much they pay.”

“He’s got a point, baby,” Lina breathed beside him.

“This has already been settled,” Gentle said. “If we have to escalate later, well, that comes later. But for now, we hit the target we’re already aiming at. Get to work.”

Haziz’s good eye narrowed, but he didn’t say anything else. He just nodded and plugged a USB connector into the vertical slot next to his camera eye. He turned away to begin analyzing the data.

Gentle turned to Keck, whose pale face looked sickly green in the glow of Haziz’s flourescent work lights. “Has your team started rehearsals yet?”

Keck nodded. “They’re in ballroom A right now.”

“Make sure they’re ready,” Gentle said. “If Haziz gets his part done, we’ll hit them tomorrow night.”

Keck nodded. Gentle turned and left the room hand-in-hand with Lina.

“I did good, right?” Lina asked.

“You did good,” Gentle said, not looking at her. “But these games you play, they’re going to end it all in tears someday.”

“What?”

Gentle stopped and looked into her eyes. And then he smiled.

Lina’s eyes widened in fear. Her hand squirmed out of his grip, but he grabbed her wrist, his finger pressing on the special nerve, the one that made it feel as if your wrist would break if you tried to resist. Press that one special spot, and you could move a person wherever you wanted them to go. And right now, he wanted her back in his room.

Her whimpers echoed off the walls as he led her to the steel fire doors leading upstairs.

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Super Movie Monday – Spider-Man (2002)

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Continuing our look back at the film adaptations of Spider-Man. Spider-Man did not enjoy the kind of pop icon status of elder statesmen like Batman and Superman. His first animated series was in 1967, just five years after his introduction, but after that, he got very little love. After the two live action television appearances of the 70’s (discussed last week), he was adapted into an intensely weird Japanese series, in which he controlled a giant Spider-robot that fought giant monsters. Back in the States, he got two animated series in 1981, and then entered a long dry period. Ultra-cheap Cannon Films made a big announcement that they would be making a live-action Spider-Man film in the late 80’s (around the time of their big-budget Masters of the Universe disaster), but the financing fell through and they lost the rights.

Then in the early 90’s, fan favorite James Cameron, hot off of Terminator 2: Judgment Day, was announced to be developing a live-action Spider-Man for Carolco Pictures. You can read the treatment here with storyboard drawings that look to have been done by Neal Adams’s Continuity (or perhaps Michael Netzer). It had some intriguing ideas, but also a lot of objectionable stuff that would be completely out of place in a Spider-Man story and out of character for Peter Parker. It fell through when Carolco went bankrupt, exposing a complicated legal rights nightmare that by the late 90’s looked like it might never be untangled. It eventually was, and in 2002, Spider-Man finally made it to the big screen with Sam Raimi at the helm. So let’s jump in, shall we?

The opening credits feature cartoony webs with computer-animated close-ups of Spider-Man’s costume over Danny Elfman’s rather generic-sounding Spider-Man theme.  The credits dissolve into a “real” (probably CG) web in a real street as Peter Parker begins with a voiceover, telling us that “This, like any story worth telling, is all about a girl.” Considering the girl in question, thank God that’s not really true.

But this introduces us to Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire), sweaty nerd, who is picked on by pretty much everybody at his school, including the other nerds and even the bus driver.

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Everybody, that is, except Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst), the girl next door, who is kind-hearted enough not to like seeing him picked on, although she is dating Flash Thompson, Peter’s chief tormentor.

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Peter’s class takes a field trip to a science lab, where we meet Peter’s best friend, poor little rich boy Harry Osborne (James Franco) and his father Norman (Willem Dafoe).

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Harry and his father have issues. Norman is a successful scientist running his own company, while Harry has been thrown out of a number of private schools and feels his father’s disapproval. He feels even worse when his father meets Peter, who is a science whiz like Norman. Oh yeah, and Peter pointedly mentions his aunt and uncle instead of parents, just so we know he’s an orphan.

The lab is doing genetic splicing on spiders, so we get descriptions of all of Spider-Man’s future powers–strength, speed, spider-sense, webs–throughout the lecture. And just so we’re not drowning in exposition here, Harry hits on Mary Jane using spider-trivia he just ridiculed Peter for knowing, setting up a later triangle. And Mary Jane reveals herself as some kind of math whiz, immediately realizing that there’s a genetically engineered super-spider missing from its case. The tour guide dismisses her observation, however.

Peter finally musters the courage to talk to Mary Jane by asking her to pose for pictures for the school newspaper (setting up his later career choice), which puts him in exactly the wrong spot to get bitten by the missing super-spider.

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And just so we don’t miss the significance, we see a computer screen in the background displaying the gene splicing sequence, ending with the words “New Species.” The scene overall does a really efficient job of introducing a number of story elements that will become important later–Peter being bullied, Harry’s hitting on Mary Jane knowing that Peter has a crush on her, Peter’s career aspirations, the laundry list of powers he will later develop–and manages to keep a light humorous touch.

Meanwhile, back at OsCorp…

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I include this shot only because I’m fascinated at the way they can combine elements to create an entire fantasy location, and also because this is the type of massive factory complex typical of Marvel Comics. You would often see Iron Man fighting in exactly this type of setting in his role as Tony Stark’s “bodyguard,” for instance. But impressive as it is, not a lot of major action occurs here. At the moment, Norman Osborne is making a presentation to a general of his various military tech projects, for instance, this guy.

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Cool as this is, the general has seen it before. What he really wants to know about is the human enhancement project. Doctor Strom, one of Osborne’s scientists, warns against human testing because one rat tested became psychotic. The general is unhappy, and Osborne is livid at Strom’s betrayal.

And now we are introduced to Uncle Ben and Aunt May. Rosemary Harris really looks a lot like the comics’ Aunt May. Uncle Ben can’t find a job and blames corporations or computers or something.

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The scene is supposed to explain why they’re struggling financially, I guess (Ben has been laid off from his job by a corporation looking to “upsize its profits”), but it doesn’t really work for me. Ben was a senior electrician working at the same company for 35 years in New York, not particularly known as a right-to-work state. Are you telling me that at 68, he doesn’t have a substantial union-negotiated retirement package? It doesn’t ring true and feels more like a screenwriter trying to score some easy sympathy by assuming his audience will automatically equate “company” with “bad guy.” Anyway, Peter returns home feeling sick. The spider bite looks really nasty, but he keeps it secret for some reason.

Back at Oscorp, Osborne decides to test the human enhancement formula on himself, like you do, and for some reason, Strom decides to help him. Once again, the scene doesn’t really ring true, but I guess they felt it was necessary to have Strom there so Osborne, driven to psychosis by the formula, can kill him right away without having to write a separate scene. God knows the movie doesn’t need to be any longer. Oh, and Willem Dafoe does a lot of yoga, so his body is really lean and cut, even in the weirdo psycho poses.

Spider-ManPsychotic

Peter dreams of DNA and spiders and skulls in a signature Raimi montage of superimposed images. He wakes up feeling (and looking) buff.

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Maguire famously buffed up for the role, which is a little odd, given that Spider-Man was always more lanky than muscle-bound. But it has the intended effect here, to make you realize that he has gone through an astounding transformation. Oh, and he can totally see right into Mary Jane’s room from his window, the little perv. Also, Mary Jane’s father is an abusive bastard and paper sticks to Peter’s hand. Ew.

Meanwhile, in the enormous Osborne mansion, Harry finds his father unconscious on the floor with no memory of the previous night. An employee arrives to say Strom has been murdered and the glider and high tech flight suit stolen.

At school, Peter discovers he has incredibly fast reflexes and a gooey white discharge from his wrist that turns out to be webbing. Ew again.

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This is actually one of the more controversial elements retained from the James Cameron version. In the comics, Spider-Man’s web’s came from wrist-mounted devices he invented himself, but in the context of the movie’s world, I find it a smaller leap of faith to accept that the same genetic alteration that gave him other spider abilities also gave him the ability to shoot webs than to believe that Peter Parker is not only super, but such a genius that he could also invent in his bedroom something that has eluded the efforts of major chemical corporations for years. Plus, there’s the whole sexual metaphor thing, or is that just me?

Anyway, Peter’s web-jaculation ends up spilling a tray of food onto Flash Thompson, who starts a fight with Peter. And so Peter learns more about his spider-senses, his speed, his agility, and his strength, which knocks Thompson twenty feet down the hall when Peter finally bothers to hit him back. And though Peter takes some pleasure in socking it to Thompson, who has tormented him for so long, abuse victim Mary Jane doesn’t look thrilled about his newfound affinity for violence.

Peter ditches school and spends the afternoon exploring his powers further, so in short order, we get our first wall-crawling scene, a brief glimpse of Maguire’s jerkily-animated CG stunt double leaping between rooftops, and Peter learning how to control his webs in a jokey sequence that has him trying different hand poses and catch phrases.

Peter finally returns home after dark to find the kitchen painted (something he was supposed to help with, so guilt) and dinner left in the oven. Peter shares a tender moment over the back fence with Mary Jane, and their relationship just doesn’t make any sense. They seem almost like strangers, and yet they have lived next door, with their houses practically touching, since he was six years old. You mean they never played together or hung out during all that time? They are interrupted by the arrival of Flash with his new car, which gives Peter the idea that he needs a car of his own to impress Mary Jane.

Problem is, to buy a car, he needs money. He sees an ad offering cash for wrestlers, “colorful characters a must.” So he designs a spider-based costume in another montage. There’s a nice touch when we see a glimpse of a black-widow based costume that that looks mighty similar to the black costume from the comics, with a note that says “Needs More Color!” Finally, he designs the iconic Spider-Man costume, inspired by the blue-and-red colors of the genetically-modified super-spider that gave him his powers.

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And that’s where we’ll leave it for now. I was thinking of going further into the story, but there were so many screencaps establishing the different characters that I decided to push the final part of Spidey’s origin to next week. See you then.

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Out of the Vault – Jontar #2

JontarCoverIf you were to ask me what the best comic in my possession is, I would be hard pressed to answer. There are so many I like for so many different reasons. But if you were to ask me about the worst, this would be it, hands down. In fact, I debated for months about including this comic in Out of the Vault, just because it’s so bad that it doesn’t seem worth wasting time and energy on. I ultimately decided to include it out of historical interest. I’ll get to the history in a bit.

The comic in question is Jontar #2, dated June 1986 from Mature Magic Publications. Just one glimpse lets you know that this is an amateur publication. Instead of the glossy cover and pulp paper of a normal comic book, the comic is printed in black-and-white on very white bond paper, like any normal book or pamphlet. The cover is printed in only two colors on the kind of heavy parchment paper you see on cheaply printed pamphlets. Text features on the inside covers (copyright notice, notes from the publisher and artist, and reader letters) are typewritten rather than typeset. The entire product screams “cheap.”

Except for the price, that is. Notice the cover price of $1.75. For comparison, a regular monthly issue of Batman, with a comparable number of story pages, printed in color with completely professional production values (though on cheap pulp paper), cost 75 cents, less than half, while a prestige product like Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns, 64 pages of full-color on white, heavy Baxter paper with full-bleed color on the cardstock covers, cost $2.95. For the record, though, I paid exactly $0.00 for this issue.

So, let’s take a look at Jontar #2, “Camel Gold,” written by Bill W. Miller and drawn by Dane Barrett . The issue begins with a two-page recap of issue #1 (originally drawn by Tony Lorenz) which is described in some detail here. Note that even though he’s from the U.S. in the modern-day, Jontar’s name is not a contraction of Jonathan Tarr or anything tropey like that. Nope, his dad named him Jontar because he was a big fan of sword-and-sorcery novels and wanted his son to have a cool-ass barbarian name. If you think that sounds a little white-trash, I’ll have you know that Jontar grew to become a respected garbageman and exotic dancer, so there.

Okay, maybe not respected so much as killed by gangsters and resurrected as a barbarian warrior complete with sword by a little elf-wizard, but whatever. In issue 2, Jontar travels to Temple Island to investigate whether the elf he found in a trashcan is related to the golden elf statues found on the island. There’s a lot of rigamarole involving a female assassin kidnapping an arms dealer and a general leading some private army or something. There are a lot of killings and double-crosses, but none of it makes much sense. In the end, Jontar defeats the bad guys and states that he’s going back to New York to clear his name.

The art by Dane Barrett, as you can tell from the cover above, is not very good. The panels are sparsely filled with clumsy figures over nearly nonexistent backgrounds, although occasionally there is a panel that looks like a decent eighth-grade swipe of somebody like Rich Buckler imitating Adams imitating Kirby, and there are occasional attempts at interesting layouts.

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But the funniest moment in the entire comic comes at the big climax. See, one claim comics made all through the 70’s and into the 80’s was that comics had a natural advantage over movies and TV because of production value. Neal Adams or Jack Kirby could dash stuff off in a single panel which would take Hollywood millions of dollars to duplicate, if they could do it at all. But because Dane Barrett was not a good artist, he resorts to the kind of cheap cutaways you often see in low-budget movies to save money.

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So what could possibly be historically significant about this comic? Well, it all goes back to the fact that the comics industry in America had by 1986 just emerged from near-demise into a new period of creative excitement and financial profitability with a new wave of creators and the rise of the direct market. But in 1986, when this issue came out, the industry nearly imploded because of books like this. Here’s the deal:

In 1984, Eastman and Laird made a huge splash with their X-Men/Frank Miller parody comic Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Its success, along with the earlier successes of independent black-and-whites like Cerberus and Elfquest, led to a flood of cheap, self-published black-and-white comics on the market by the time Jontar hit the stands. And for a while, they were making huge money, because the low print runs of independent comics made the success stories into instantly rare collector’s items, which lured spectators into the market to buy up a ton of this junk in the hopes that they’d find the next TMNT #1, which led comics shop owners to order every crappy black-and-white comic being released, so they wouldn’t get left out if one happened to hit. It was a cheap, black-and-white tulipmania.

Until a few months later, when people were realizing most of what they were buying was crap like Jontar, which would never be a hit. The speculators dropped out, leaving the comics shops with a ton of unsellable inventory on their shelves, which meant they had no money to order new inventory. Stores went out of business and some smaller publishers, good ones, ended up going bankrupt. And the stores that managed to weather the storm probably ended up doing what my store did, which was to hand me a free copy of Jontar #2 and say, “Do you want this? Because I’m just going to throw it away otherwise.”

And the most incredible part of this entire story? Jontar actually ran for FOUR ISSUES! Seriously.

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Metatronic Chapter Eight: Gentle

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CHAPTER EIGHT

GENTLE

 

 

“Wait,” Barron said quietly. “Are you suggesting that this Gentle person had something to do with my wife’s death?”

Barron felt very cold inside. It had happened three years ago, and yet he still had trouble even saying Rachel’s name. The thought of her was so painful that he had spent most of the time since her death trying to pretend that she had never existed, which was one reason Grace could no longer stand being in the same room with him. The last thing he wanted to do was revisit the circumstances of her death. Her absence was still too tangible, felt every moment in that hateful formula shouting itself in his head, which had imposed its presence in his mind on the same day—almost at the same moment, it felt now—as she departed.

“Well, no, not exactly,” Savage said. He looked uncertainly at Van Treece, as if just realizing that his revelation was going to have less impact than he’d anticipated. “I mean, Zero Day was a worldwide event, so I doubt if he actually caused the collapse or anything. But then again, nobody remembers what happened that day, so we can’t rule it out.”

“That’s it?” Van Treece asked. “That’s your big reason for bringing Mister Barron in? That’s an awfully slim thread, Anton.”

“I know,” Savage said. “But it’s… There are no accidents. There are no coincidences. The universe is made up of patterns, and if you don’t see one, then that just means you don’t have enough data yet. Gentle’s connection to Barron’s past means something, even if we can’t explain it yet. I’m sure of it.”

“What do you think, Mister Barron?” Van Treece asked.

Barron didn’t answer right away. Savage had made two statements, one false and one mostly true. Someone did remember Zero Day. But his experiences since then had convinced him that coincidence was merely the human name for a pattern we couldn’t yet perceive, a vortex amid fractal chaos. “Tell me about Gentle first, and we’ll go from there.”

“He’s an eco-terrorist,” Julie Anselmo said. She stared at the table’s surface as if reading the words she spoke. “Started out small, spiking trees and ramming whalers with established activist groups. He’s only grown more radical since. Has his own splinter group, a small core that can link up with affiliated groups when he needs more manpower.”

“His heart’s in the right place, but his methods suck,” Isobel added.

“Bullshit, his heart’s in the right place,” Van Treece said. “He’s a wacko nutjob.”

“That’s a little…” Anselmo started.

“It’s not nearly,” Van Treece cut her off. “He’s one of these guys, loves ideas in general, hates them when they become specific. You know what I mean? Hates oil and gas, loves wind and solar. Until you decide to build a wind farm, and then he’ll blow up the towers because you’re killing endangered birds. Build a solar farm in the desert or a tidal power station, he’ll blow them up, too, because you’re disturbing delicate ecosystems. He doesn’t give a shit about the environment. He just likes using it as an excuse to blow stuff up.”

“People can’t be summed up that easily. They’re more complicated,” Isobel said. “You can’t just make a blanket statement about his motives like that.”

“The hell I can’t,” Van Treece said and turned to Barron. “Virginia, six years ago, he sets bombs on a ridge to stop a mining operation. Landslide buries 27 miners, causes havoc downslope, dust cloud ended up killing plants and wildlife for miles. He didn’t care. Five months later, firebombs a logging camp in Washington and ends up burning down 200 acres of forest.”

“I can get you files if you sign on,” Anselmo said.

“Guy’s a tumor,” Van Treece finished.

“Why isn’t he in jail?”

“He’s smart,” Anselmo said. “He leaves tracks, but not enough for the feds to make a case.”

“So what’s our interest?” Barron asked. “The feds aren’t subcontracting their investigation to an outside firm.”

“We have a client,” Van Treece said. “They’re worried Gentle’s going to hit their operation.”

“Who’s the client?”

“That’s confidential information. What makes you think I’d tell you before I hired you?” Van Treece asked.

“Because I won’t sign up until I know what I’m here to do and who I’m doing it for,” Barron answered. He nodded at Isobel. “And because if I turn you down, Isobel can make me forget what you told me.”

And with that last card laid on the table, Barron saw a wave of change in the data he was seeing from the people at the table. It was subtle, but real relief that this final gambit did not have to be held secret any longer. And at the sight of that relief, Barron realized two things: he had missed this job more than he had wanted to admit to himself, and he would almost certainly end up joining this team. Not because of Rachel–that had been a flimsy pretext for recruiting him—but because Isobel had been right. He could do good here.

Van Treece nodded. “You’ve heard of UNOPCO?”

“The orbital power project?”

“You know about it, then.”

“I know what the name means.”

Van Treece nodded at Savage. “Eighty-seven satellites,” Savage said. “Three giant solar collectors at L1, 4, and 5 beam power down to seven distribution sats in high Earth orbit, which distribute the power down to 77 satellites in geosynchronous orbit, which basically blanket the Earth in free electricity. No matter where you are, you flip a switch and you have power. Power from on high. They call it the Heavenly Choir.”

“We’ll still need a traditional power grid for very power-intensive applications like manufacturing,” Van Treece said, “and we’ll still need to burn fuel for larger, heavier vehicles, but for the most of us, it will be like heaven on earth. No more electric bills, no more trips to the filling station. The world’s use of fossil fuels will decrease dramatically.”

“And Gentle is against this why?”

Van Treece shrugged. “Because he’s an idiot. He’s afraid they’re going to bombard the world with microwaves. Cook the entire planet.”

“Could he be right?”

“UNOPCO’s been running a test village for almost two years off of a single satellite,” Savage said. “No ill effects have been reported, either in the people or the environment. Nothing outside what would be statistically normal, anyway.”

“Metatron’s set for launch in about three weeks,” Van Treece said. “We need to make sure that launch happens as scheduled.”

“Metatron?” Barron asked.

“The final satellite,” Van Treece said.

“Metatron is an apocryphal name for the highest of the angels,” Savage said. “He serves as the voice for God.”

“Once Metatron achieves its orbit, it will send the signal that activates the entire grid,” Van Treece said. “He starts the Choir singing. We need to see him safely there, and that means we’ve got to stop Gentle. So Mister Barron, are you in, or shall I have Isobel escort you out?”

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Super Movie Monday – Spider-Man 1977

No real screencaps in this one because the only version I could watch was an awful low-rez video upload on Youtube. I’m launching into the Spider-Man films, but first I want to revisit the original Spider-Man production from 1977. This was not the very first live-action appearance of Spider-Man, however; that was the “Spidey Super Stories” segments on The Electric Company starting in 1974 (the link goes to a typical episode featuring, among others, a young Morgan Freeman in the cast).

However, in 1977, Universal and CBS Television debuted the first of four live-action Marvel super-heroes developed for the network. Spider-Man debuted in the fall of 1977, starring Nicholas Hammond (best known as Friedrich, the older Von Trapp boy in The Sound of Music) as college student and aspiring news photographer Peter Parker.

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J. Jonah Jameson was played by David White, best known as Larry Tate, Darren’s boss on the sitcom Bewitched. In the film, Peter tries repeatedly to sell Jonah photos as New York (which looks amazingly like Los Angeles) is being terrorized by an unknown extortionist.  The extortionist is threatening to kill ten random people via mind-controlled suicide if the city does not pay him $50 million dollars ransom. And just to prove that he is legit, he has  normally upstanding citizens–doctors, lawyers, judges, college professors–commit robberies and then crash their cars into walls, where his henchmen are waiting to retrieve the money and their mind-controlling lapel pins.

Meanwhile, Peter has a problem of his own: he has been bitten by a spider that has been accidentally exposed to radioactive materials in the college lab. Peter discovers that he can climb walls, is really strong, and has a kind of sixth sense. And after he is accidentally spotted by a purse snatcher during one of his wall-climbing experiments, he becomes front-page material, prompting Peter to make himself a costume so that he can photograph himself for the paper without outing himself as a freak.

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It’s not a horrible costume, as these things go. It’s very true to the comics, with the exception of the metallic eye lenses, the single web shooter worn on the wrist, and the utility belt holding extra web cartridges. Spider-Man’s powers, on the other hand, are not so impressive. Although they pay lip service to Peter’s increased strength, we don’t get the kinds of strength gags that were a mainstay of shows like The Six Million Dollar Man. His spider-sense is depicted simply by quick-cutting between Hammond looking moony and whatever the script wants him to sense (and instead of being a simple danger signal, it function almost like a kind of ESP, helping him figure out the identity of the villain, for instance). The webs are clunky white strings, usually depicted coming out via a reversed film gag. The stunt fighting and acrobatics are really terrible.

Spidey’s signature wall-crawling features both the best and worst effects work in the whole show. There are some really horrible process shots matting Spider-Man’s figure onto a building. But there are some good effects filmed live, with a stuntman being hauled up on an unseen cable while he mimes climbing the wall, and also some shots of him crawling around on a horizontal building facade that would be more convincing if they didn’t spend so much time on them (the shadows are a dead giveaway after a while).

The two storylines collide when Peter hooks up with Judy Tyler, daughter of one of the mind control victims, to clear her father’s name. Peter and Judy stumble almost accidentally onto self-help guru Edward Byron, who is using special technology to hypnotize his clients into following his commands. Soon, Peter, dressed as Spider-Man, follows a special coded microwave signal to Byron’s headquarters, where he encounters three Japanese warriors who attack him (clumsily) with shinai (bamboo training swords). The swords are deliberately designed not to hurt much when they strike, which makes them a curious choice for a villain’s henchmen, but I guess in 1977, they looked exotic. Peter barely escapes with his life twice. In his final encounter with the swordsmen, after he has narrowly managed to avoid killing himself via mind control, he tells the swordsmen he has reversed the microwaves and asks them to just let him in, which they do. Climax averted.

Although the movie was incredibly bland and excitement-free, Spider-Man had enough of a fan following to make it a relative success. The show was picked up as a limited-run summer replacement series, eventually airing 12 more episodes over two seasons. Of the other three Marvel heroes CBS introduced, Doctor Strange and Captain America failed to get picked up as series, while The Incredible Hulk was a hit, running five for five seasons.

If you really must see this film for whatever reason, you can watch it here, although as I said at the top, picture quality is really bad.

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Out of the Vault – Cap’n Quick and a Foozle

EclipseMonthlyCover1Coming in a day late, sorry. Still trying to adjust my time management to an overnight schedule.

Last week, we revisited a story published by Eclipse titled “Slab,” which was a reworking of a Steve Englehart Superman/Creeper story he had pulled from DC. It was first published in a short-lived black-and-white anthology titled Eclipse Magazine. In 1983, Eclipse revived the anthology idea in a color comic book titled Eclipse Monthly. Featured series included Rio, a hard-bitten Western by Jonny Quest creator Doug Wildey, another oddball Steve Ditko creation titled Static (not related to the later DC/Milestone character), The Masked Man by B.C. Boyer, and an adaptation by Trina Robbins of Sax Rohmer’s Dope, a tale of heroic British investigators on the trail of fiendish Chinese opium dealers in which the racism was apparently okay because it was ironic or something.

Oh yeah, and the Foozle returned in Cap’n Quick and a Foozle.

This time, Rogers took over the writing as well as the art. Instead of using the science-fictional future as drag to disguise a super-hero story, however, this time the Foozle’s world became an other-dimensional fantasy world, like OZ or Neverwhere or, perhaps most fittingly, the Fuzzies-in-Space adventure Bucky O’Hare, right down to the precocious genius human child who crosses over thanks to his invention. The story opens with an unnamed protagonist in a basement workshop using his dad’s tools to make a special pair of shoes.

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Not sure why we’re never shown the kid’s face clearly. Rogers quits the black shadow effect after this page, maybe because it makes the kid look evil, but the face is either colored dark, dark blue or bright yellow under the work light, and then only in profile. There’s never a good full-face shot. Also, like most of Rogers’s work, important details are hard to make out because of color gimmicks. In this case, there’s a shadowy hooded figure in every panel who is printed only in blue as a color hold. The shadowy figure pokes his finger into the kid’s head, causing him to hiccup as he’s soldering important connections. The shoes are intended to make the kid able to physically enter video games, and to that end, the kid has taken his father’s video game controller to use with the shoes. He also makes himself a superhero costume with a fuzzy blanket for a cape and his grandfather’s old leather flying helmet with goggles so Rogers doesn’t have to keep drawing the kid’s face in shadow.

But when the shoes are finished and the kid gives them a test run, he ends up somewhere very else, namely a dive bar on an alien world where he crashes into a group of thugs threatening a man with an alien black bird. The pair flee with the kid in tow and end up hiding in a bathroom. The black alien bird is a Foozle named Klonsbon (and there’s never any allusion that he shares an identity with a mysterious female reporter–in fact, Foozles seem to be an entire alien race now), and the man is named Big Bill. The kid, whom the Foozle dubs “Cap’n,” dropped his dad’s video game controller in the bar and can’t get back home without it. So Big Bill leads the thugs away while Klonsbon returns to the bar with the Cap’n, who is promptly captured by secret police clones dubbed “Pseudopheds.”

Thus begin the Cap’n’s adventures while Klonsbon tries to track the kid down with the help of a group of oddballs.

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This should give you an idea of the ‘anything goes’ spirit of the thing. There’s a character who’s selling stuff out of the same Acme catalog that Wile E. Coyote ordered his stuff out of (he even ordered the same bat-suit)…

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A character with almost no cognitive function who can copy items with a touch, and yes, that is a living cartoon glove flying around with them in panels 1 and 3. Meanwhile, the Cap’n escapes from captivity when he discovers his shoes now let him run super-fast. He falls in with a gang of street urchins who dub him Cap’n Quick and determine to help get his controller back from the Pseudopheds. The Pseudopheds are controlled by a cabal of anthropomorphic rats. You know they’re evil because they look like conservative political figures from the 70’s and 80’s, like Richard Nixon, Henry Kissinger, Margaret Thatcher and Menachem Begin. The cabal work for a mysterious shadowy someone who seems to be connected to the phantom which helped the Cap’n make his magic shoes.

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After four issues of Eclipse Monthly (which wasn’t–it took six months to publish the first four issues), the series then moved to its own book, Cap’n Quick & a Foozle. The first issue, which came out six months after it left Eclipse Monthly, featured the wrap-up of the first storyline, in which Klonsbon and Cap’n Quick reunite to bring down the evil rats with the help of  their new friends and the Cap’n’s cat, who followed him through the dimensional portal and who also happens to be sentient.

CapnQuickCover1It was nine months before the second issue appeared, and it soon became apparent that Rogers had no idea where the story was going next. Klonsbon and the Cap’n left their friends and ended up stranded in space, then on a strange planet populated by parodies of characters like Judge Dredd, Mandrake the Magician (or maybe all comics magicians, since he seems to be a combination of Mandrake/Zatara and Ibis the Invincible) and Lenny and George from Of Mice and Men. The issue ended with the pair using the Cap’n’s shoes to go through the dimensional portal. Would they end up back in the Capn’s basement, or somewhere even weirder?

We would never find out the answer, because the next issue, which did not see print for another five months, was titled simply The Foozle and (as recounted last week) reprinted the original Superman/Creeper knock-off story with an unrelated back-up story titled “R.S.V.P.” by Oklahoma natives John Wooley and Terry Tidwell, who would later collaborate on The Twilight Avenger and The Miracle Squad.

And that was it. The pair are still lost in that interdimensional void, and since Rogers died in 2007, that’s probably where they’ll stay forever.

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Metatronic Chapter Seven: The Team

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CHAPTER SEVEN

THE TEAM

 

Van Treece led the way down the hall to an elevator at the end. The doors opened as they reached it.

“I didn’t see you hit the button,” Barron said as he stepped in.

“There isn’t one,” Van Treece said. “This isn’t the 19th Century. Three.”

The elevator doors closed and the car began to descend. Van Treece looked at Barron with a half-smile. “Questions? Comments?”

“About what, the elevator?”

Van Treece nodded.

“Nope,” Barron said.

“Nothing?” Isobel asked.

“I’m curious how you authorize access, obviously,” Barron said. “But you’re not going to tell me until I’m cleared to know, so why waste all our time asking pointless questions?”

“Other than that one?” Van Treece asked, but did not follow it up with Strike three.

The elevator doors opened onto a beige hallway. Red strobes spaced at twenty-foot intervals along the hallway flashed twice, repeating every ten seconds. Barron followed Van Treece down the hall with Isobel bringing up the rear. “We’re meeting in the conference room, here at the end,” Van Treece said as they walked.

Barron glanced into an office as they passed, saw computer monitors on screensaver, wall charts covered with heavy tarps, blank whiteboards. They entered a double doorway at the end of the hall into a room that was much more plush than anything he’d seen so far, with thick carpeting, leather chairs and a huge mahogany table with slate insets. The people already seated—three men and a woman, all lined up on the far side of the table—looked up as Van Treece entered.

“Have a seat,” Van Treece said, indicating a seat on the vacant side of the table. Barron sat in the chair indicated. Van Treece sat at the head of the table, and Isobel sat beside Barron.

“You must use this room a lot,” Barron said, running his finger down the seamless join between smooth slate and glossy wood.

“Perks of being the boss,” Van Treece agreed. “These are our department heads. Anton Savage heads up our IT and electronic collection.”

A heavyset man, whose bushy reddish-blonde beard seemed to be an attempt to compensate for his thinning hair up top, half-stood and reached across the table to shake hands. His polo shirt made him the most casually-dressed man at the table. “Glad to have you on board.”

“I’m not on board yet,” Barron said. “You’re the guy who restored the security video?”

Savage’s beard puffed out with his smile. He glanced at the others alongside the table. “Yeah, that was me. You didn’t make it easy.”

“Really curious how you did that.”

“Show me yours, I’ll show you mine.”

Van Treece cleared his throat for attention, then indicated Isobel. “Cris runs the HUMINT side of the operation, and Julie Anselmo here runs our analysis shop.”

A brown-haired woman, mid-to-late 40’s, briefly met Barron’s eyes and nodded. She was almost the opposite of Isobel: plain and dark and heavy, with no make-up but wearing a flowery, feminine dress in contrast to Isobel’s business-like attire. She said nothing and made no effort to shake hands.

“Arthur Fincher is in charge of equipment and special projects,” Van Treece said, indicating the next man down the table. A tall, thin man in a brown suit reached across to shake Barron’s hand.

“Special projects. So you plan the office parties or what?” Barron asked.

“He makes the skins,” said the last man in line, a powerfully built man with buzz-cut black hair and a no-nonsense attitude. He wore a jacket, but no tie. Barron wasn’t sure they made shirts with a neck big enough for him to button.

“Ramon Quesada runs our special tactical team,” Van Treece said. “Some of their equipment is non-standard. Mister Fincher builds it in-house.”

“Best in the world,” Fincher said.

“When it works,” Quesada muttered.

“So that’s the team,” Van Treece said and waited.

“So am I to assume that I would be on Ms. Crisostomo’s team?” Barron asked.

“Interesting,” Van Treece said. “What brings you to that conclusion?”

“She scouted me. She recruited me. She’s the only one on my side of the table.”

Savage started to say something, but Van Treece cut him off with a small gesture. “I’d like to hear your thoughts on that,” Van Treece said. “Is that where you see yourself fitting in here?”

“No, that’s just it,” Barron said. “I don’t see myself fitting in here anywhere. I mean, I’m obviously not here for electronics or—sorry, Mister Fincher–mad science. I was mainly an analyst at Bulwark, but it seems like it was my combat skills that put me on your radar. But from the look on Mr. Quesada’s face, I’m not here to join your tac team.”

“It would take too long to train you on the skin,” Quesada said, “that’s if we had one to spare.”

“So that leaves Isobel’s team,” Barron continued. “I know she has field agents assigned. At least, I hope those were her people and not your tac team watching the perimeter when she met me.”

“We had one man there,” Quesada said. “For support if you caused trouble.”

“The sniper on overwatch?” Barron asked.

Quesada’s eyes narrowed. “You shouldn’t have been able to see him.”

Barron smiled and turned to Van Treece. “But the thing is, I have no real experience in HUMINT asset management, and I doubt I’d be meeting all the lead personnel if you just wanted my gun arm. Look, I mostly like what I see here. Your operation looks squared away, your people know what they’re doing, and you’re not government, which is a plus. But I still don’t know exactly what role you need me to fill, and what I’ve seen so far isn’t enough to get me to leave a job I like to come here. So you tell me: why should I stay? Or is that strike three?”

Van Treece’s scar made his smile uneven. “No, it’s not strike three. But actually, I’m not entirely sure where you’re supposed to fit in, either. Cris and Anton came to me and said we needed you, and I trusted their judgment enough to bring you in and have a look at you. Now that you’re here, I like what I see, but I’m still curious as to what you’re supposed to bring to the table that we don’t already have. Anton?”

Savage curled his lower lip under his front teeth so that his beard bristled forward even more. After a moment’s thought, he said, “Okay, first, Cris didn’t scout you. I did. At first, I was just having fun digging into a News of the Weird item about a foiled bank robbery. Five robbers killed, mystery hero fades away, security video erased. Normally, stuff like that never lives up to the hype. But with this one, the deeper I dug, the more interesting it got.”

“That’s good, Anton, but it still doesn’t answer our question,” Van Treece said. “What does his bank robbery have to do with our project?”

“Nothing,” Savage said. “At least, not the bank robbery. Mister Barron, have you ever heard of Nathan Gentle?”

“Don’t recognize the name,” Barron said. “Who is he?”

“The only survivor of Building 2413.”

Barron froze. Van Treece asked, “What’s that?”

“Building 2413 of Bridger Carriageworks in Detroit collapsed on Zero Day,” Savage said. “That was where Mister Barron’s wife died.”

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Super Movie Monday – The Iron Giant, Part 2

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Concluding our two part look back at 1999’s The Iron Giant. In 1957, young Hogarth Hughes has befriended a gigantic robot which has fallen from outer space and eats metal. Hogarth hides him out in beatnik artist Dean McCoppin’s junkyard, where the giant can eat to his heart’s content.

Hogarth returns home around dawn, where he is unpleasantly surprised to learn that government agent Kent Mansley has become his mother’s new boarder. However, Mansley is only interested in finding the giant, to the point that he cracks and screams at Hogarth in the malt shoppe…

IronGiantPropaganda

At least until the laxatives Hogarth has slipped into Mansley’s malt take effect. And this is where the film starts to lose me. Mansley is portrayed as a caricature of the worst left-wing fantasies about Cold War paranoiacs. Mansley is the dark side of those 50’s “Duck and Cover” movies parodied earlier in the scenes in Hogarth’s classroom. He backs Hogarth against the wall while screaming at him about the Chinese and the Soviets, and we are supposed to dismiss him as a raving lunatic because we’ve seen how gentle the giant is and as far as the film is concerned, Stalin doesn’t exist. But in the real world that this film seems to be trying to make a statement about, there are a few million Russians who could tell you just how correct Mansley is to be paranoid about Stalin’s regime, if they weren’t too executed to do so.

Anyway, Hogarth gets away and finds that Dean has put the giant to work, helping him create his metal sculptures.

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One thing I really like about the giant is the Miyazaki feel I get from him, not just in his design, but in the way he acts, his innocent charm.

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Hogarth talks Dean into going out to the lake, where the giant learns how to cannonball. Later, Hogarth and the giant then run across a deer in the woods, where we get our next heavy-handed morality lesson.

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The deer is, of course, completely unafraid of the gentle metal giant, but flees when it hears a twig snap. And seconds later, a shot rings out. The giant and Hogarth follow the sound to find two hunters by the dead body of the deer. Hogarth tells the giant all about the finality of death, and we learn that “guns kill” and “it’s bad to kill.” We also get a brief ominous hint that the giant may be more dangerous than we thought.

And I’m not trying to somehow take the knee-jerk contrarian “yay, murder” view here, but it’s weird in a film that tries to be a sophisticated all-ages fantasy with some real charm and emotional depth to the main characters, that the villain is such a cardboard Emmanuel Goldstein for whom we should feel nothing but our requisite Two-Minute Hate and the moral lesson is delivered in such a blanket fashion in the vocabulary of a kindergartener.

So Hogarth leaves the giant at the junk yard and heads back home, where he is tied up and interrogated by Mansley, who has found a photograph of Hogarth and the giant together. Mansley threatens to have Annie declared an unfit parents and take Hogarth away from her, so Hogarth confesses the giant’s location. Mansley calls General Rogard to come take the giant into custody.

However, Hogarth is able to slip away while Mansley is sleeping, so when the army arrives the next morning, they find…

IronGiantArt

The giant as art. Not only is Mansley discredited, but Annie gets to see Dean’s artistic side, and we get the first hints of a romance between the two. The soldiers leave and Hogarth celebrates by playing cops and robbers with his giant buddy. But although he wants the giant to play the evil robot Atomo, the giant hangs a big ‘S’ on his chest and calls himself Superman. And look, he even has the heat vision!

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Yeah, turns out that when the giant sees weapons, even fake kiddie spark guns, he goes into a defensive mode that most of us would call “attacking.” Damn, I’d hate to see what he would have done to that kid with the Pop-Tart.

So Dean freaks out and calls the giant a “big gun that walks.” The giant is so dejected that he runs away, and just so we know how bleak things have gotten, it starts to snow. Dean realizes that the attack was a defensive reflex and helps Hogarth chase after him. But before they can catch up, the giant saves a couple of kids in town from falling off a building. Yay, he’s a hero again!

Until the army arrives and starts shooting at him. The giant grabs Hogarth and runs away to protect him. Dean tells Mansley that the army must stop the attack so as not to endanger Hogarth, but evil Emmanuel Mansley tells the general Hogarth is already dead, so the general calls in an airstrike. In the course of running away, the giant discovers that he can fly, which is pretty thrilling for about 20 seconds, until the fighter jets arrive. After a brief aerial chase, the giant is shot down. He sits up to see Hogarth lying unmoving in the snow and assumes he is dead.

So this time, when the soldiers arrive and resume shooting, the giant does not fight his violent urges, which is when he transforms into an awesome alien uberweapon of immense power.

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The tanks cannot stand against him, so Mansley convinces the general to order a nuclear strike from an offshore submarine. But before they can launch, a not-dead Hogarth manages to calm the giant down, and Dean convinces the general to suspend the attack. Which is not good enough for Mansley, who is even more frantic and paranoid than before. He seizes the general’s radio and orders the nuclear strike. The missile launches; the town is doomed.

But the giant, who has decided he is not a gun, shares a tragic goodbye with Hogarth (complete with reprised, recontextualized dialogue from earlier in the movie) and takes off to stop the missile before it can hit the town. As he nears the missile, the giant says, wistfully, “Superman…”

IronGiantSuperman

And this moment is so perfect, not just because it encapsulates the giant’s yearning to be more than a weapon, but because it calls back two previous Superman appearances. In the 1978 Superman the Movie starring Christopher Reeve, Superman races to stop a nuclear missile in the climax. And more significantly, there’s a 1953 episode of The Adventures of Superman starring George Reeves titled “Panic in the Sky,” in which Superman must stop an asteroid threatening to destroy Metropolis. They even mimic the camera angle.

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The giant collides with the missile in space just as it’s beginning its descent and there’s a huge explosion. And because Superman is a Christ figure, and the movie wants us to identify the giant with Superman, his destruction leaves a huge glowing cross in the sky that doubles as the Christmas star.

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And so, everybody but Mansley and the giant live happily ever after.

Um, just make that Mansley. Because as we saw earlier, the giant has a beacon that can call his scattered pieces in so he can reassemble himself. And sure enough…

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He is Risen.

And that’s it. I really like this film in a lot of ways. The production values are great. I love the voice acting, and the animation has a lot of appeal, and the characters are charming with one major exception.

But the big flaw that keeps this film from being a classic for the ages is something I see in a lot of Hollywood films, and that is the tendency to confuse a political message with a moral one. The movie’s moral message–“You decide who you are going to be”–is a fine one, but it gets muddied by being dragged into the political weeds of  “Guns are bad” and “the Army’s kind of useless” and “the Cold War was just a bunch of crazy right-wing dudes overreacting to a non-existent threat.” One message is universal, the others really aren’t.

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Out of the Vault: The Foozle

Foozle3CoverActually going to spend two weeks on this one, because it’s a sort of circular story. It all started with Steve Englehart having a dispute with DC Comics over payment on a story for DC Comics Presents. Englehart took the work he had done for DC and walked. A planned Madame Xanadu storyline was later published by Eclipse under the title Scorpio Rose (which I discussed over on the other blog a few years ago). But first, Englehart’s Superman/Creeper story, “Slab,” was adapted by Marshall Rogers (with new characters) in 1981 for the black-and-white Eclipse Magazine (or as the cover stated–Eclipse: The Magazine).

I don’t have any issues of that old black-and-white, but I do have a reprint of the story in The Foozle #3 with colors by Tim Smith. While it was nice to finally be able to read the story about which I’d heard so much, the reprint’s format is doubly bad. Marshall Rogers used lots of gray tones for the black-and-white art, which ended up making muddy moire patterns when colored. This problem is exacerbated by the very small panels, designed to be reproduced in an 8.5 x 11″ magazine. When shrunk down to standard comic book size, some of the page layouts become very hard to read, and doubly so with muddy colors killing the contrast.

But let’s muddle through, shall we?

The story opens in the futuristic city of Great Megalopolis, where tabloid reporter G2W384-38-8742, known colloqiually as Sweeney, meets big-name television reporter K2T732-43-3929, aka Hanna. If you are at all familiar with the DC characters in question, then you will know that Sweeney is a stand-in for tabloid reporter Jack Ryder, alter ego of the Creeper, while Hanna is obviously a female translieteration of Clark Kent. One interesting thing they do with the colors here is to color the reporters’ respective clothing similar to the DC characters’ costumes; Sweeney is wearing Creeper yellow, while Hanna wears Superman blue (as well as Clark Kent’s trademark glasses).FoozleSecretIdentitiesSweeney has come looking for tabloid dirt on Storbor, whom she calls “the Big Blue Boss.” Apparently some people seem to regard such a powerful man with some suspicion of his motives. Hanna ushers Sweeney out and then receives a mental summons, which prompts her to change into S-329, Agent of Storbor. She is not, in fact, the Big Blue Boss, but a preteen girl who acts as his muscle or something. Englehart and Rogers do an interesting mix-up here, combining elements of Superman, Captain Marvel (in reverse), and Green Lantern, as Hanna recites a mystic oath then changes from normal adult to super-powered child. Agent S-329 flies around on a high-tech bed; I’m not sure where the inspiration for that comes from. Is it a variation on the Silver Surfer idea of a character riding a flying version of a random everyday object, or was it perhaps inspired by the little girl from Superboy #176?

Anyway, the agent attacks a chop-shop for stolen vehicles, and in the process, a fire is started which results in a huge explosion. One of the innocent bystanders caught in the explosion is E4D917-02-5516, aka Jacson, a friend of Sweeney’s who now works as a TV photojournalist. The explosion covers Jacson with a number of toxic substances which transforms his body into a steel-like substance, and also gives him an unnatural hunger for the minerals contained in the human body. Agent S-329 attempts to apprehend Jacson, but he escapes and runs to his friend Sweeney for help. She, not knowing about his murderous urges, agrees to help him clear his name and transforms into the infamous Foozle, a bird-like creature feared by civilians and criminals alike.

The Foozle tracks down Skrum, one of the men running the chop shop, and convinces him to tell the authorities that the giant Slab of a man was not part of their operation. Apparently, the Foozle’s main power is just to sit on people’s heads and scare them or something, because we never really see the Foozle do anything. In fact, the Foozle’s terrifying reputation may be based entirely on bluff and intimidation; we don’t know. Doesn’t matter, because before Skrum can do anything, Agent S-329 shows up.

FoozleConfrontation

The Foozle changes back to Sweeney and tries to convince the agent that Jacson was not involved, but the agent arrogantly shoves her out of the way and flies off (after comparing her to a yapping dog). So now, since the Big Blue Boss will apparently never be convinced of Jacson’s innocence, Sweeney decides to smuggle Jacson out of the city by train.

Unfortunately, Jacson’s insatiable hunger for minerals flares up again, and he attacks bystanders on the train platform. The Agent shows up to stop him, after which the Foozle shows up to stop her. But during the fight, Jacson stuns the agent with a mighty punch, after which his unsated hunger causes a chemical reaction which transforms him into explosive anti-matter. With the woozy Agent S-329 unable to help, The Foozle barely manages to get the bystanders out of the way before Jacson explodes.

Afterward, the Foozle expresses surprise that the agent saved him while his friend Jacson ended up nearly killing him. “What did you expect?” the agent asks, confused, which sends the Foozle into raucous Creeper-like laughter.

All in all, an odd story. The thing that really gets me is the way the Superman stand-in is depicted as a sort-of totalitarian bully, distrusted and hated by the Foozle. And I wonder if this was the characterization Englehart would have given the real Superman/Creeper pairing, or if he made the Agent more overbearing as some sort of editorial comment on DC.

But here’s the thing: the story was basically a one-off curiosity piece, Englehart burning off some unsold inventory with help from his friend Rogers. And that’s the way things stood for about two years, until Rogers decided to bring the Foozle back.

Which we’ll talk about next time.

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