Metatronic Chapter Two: The Language of God

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CHAPTER TWO
THE LANGUAGE OF GOD

 

Those couple of people who hadn’t made it out the door yet froze at the voice. Gang-banger took a step forward. “You really think…?”

The thing about the standard two-handed grip, other than allowing you to better aim with the sights and compensate for recoil, was that it kept your pistol on target if you had a tendency to talk with your hands. Gang-banger’s gesture wasn’t big—something like a wrist shrug—but it caused the barrel of the pistol to deviate almost two inches. That was enough for Barron.

His thumb clicked the safety lever on the side of the AK as he stepped forward. Grace let out a little screech as he swept the rifle up and struck Gang-banger’s wrist with it, knocking the pistol away. He stepped through the swing in one continuous motion, releasing the rifle behind him like a major league batter as his right hand snapped forward and grabbed the kid’s collar on the opposite side. He grabbed the kid’s tunic with his other hand, his wrists forming an ‘x,’ and then twisted the collar tight, forcing his forearm against Gang-banger’s throat, choking him.

As the kid flailed with his arms, Barron swept his leg, knocking him to the ground, Barron falling forward on top of him. Barron’s weight landed on the forearm pinned against Gang-banger’s throat. There was a crack, and all the fight went out of him. The entire process had taken maybe two seconds.

“Are you crazy? What…?” Grace started to ask, but Barron shushed her.

Footsteps sounded in the corridor leading to the vault. Barron grabbed up the pistol on the floor and sighted toward the corner. Grace’s boss appeared first, followed by Lefty. “What the hell are you two…?”

Barron put a round into Lefty’s hip, rocking the man back. Grace’s boss tore out of the man’s grip and ran out of the line of fire. Lefty spent a precious second trying to grab her back instead of attending to Barron, in which time Barron put two more rounds into Lefty’s chest. He stumbled back as his prisoner raced for the door.

Barron wasted a second to assess the man’s wounds. He probably should have kept shooting, but wanted to save ammo for the guys still in the vault; he would need some suppressive fire to get a good solution on the shotgun guy. That half-second of wasted time allowed Lefty to duck back around the corner from which he’d come.

No blood from the chest wounds, Barron realized. Lefty was wearing a vest. Reasonable to assume the others were, too. Blood on the floor, though. The hip shot had scored, apparently.

Barron dimly heard shouted voices above the ringing in his ears. He advanced to the corner, peeked around, saw Shotgun drawing down on him. He ducked back as a shotgun blast tore at the corner. Ducked back around and hit him with a snapshot that sent him reeling; his return shotgun blast went wild. Grey fired back, and Barron dodged back around the corner.

“Get out of here!” Barron shouted to Grace.

“No!” Grace replied, though her posture was uncertain. Beyond her, the AK kid was getting to his feet.

“Then bring me that rifle,” Barron said above shouts from the vault. He ducked around the corner, tried to shoot Shotgun, who was struggling to his feet. The shot went wild as he had to duck back immediately under fire from the vault.

“It’s empty,” Grace said.

“No, it’s not!” Barron said.

“But the bullet holes in the ceiling…”

“I bluffed,” Barron said. The AK kid’s head snapped around at that one, just in time to see Barron put a bullet into his head. Grace shrieked. “And search him for extra magazines while you’re at it.”

He heard a crash from the vault. He ducked around the corner for a quick look, managed to see Shotgun disappear back into the vault and a steel cart dumped onto its side blocking most of the doorway. He ducked back again as more pistol shots rang out, though not as big a volley as before. They were conserving ammo, too.

He could hear voices from the vault, but the ringing in his ears kept him from making out the words. Still, they didn’t have many options. They were in a room with only one exit, and time was not on their side. If they were still in there when the cops arrived, they’d be stuck. But with three of them and a cart for cover, they could send two guys up each side of the hallway with one guy back behind the cart for suppressive fire to keep Barron pinned down until they had him flanked.

Not the worst plan in the world, if they had been facing practically anybody else.

“Here.” Barron glanced to his side to see Grace holding out the rifle and a second magazine. Her mascara had run from tears, and her eyes were terrified, but she was still there beside him.

“Set ’em on the ground,” Barron said, then dropped to one knee and raised his voice. “You guys might as well give up. Once the cops get here, there’s only one way this ends.”

“Give up?” Grey’s voice sounded incredulous. “We’ve got you outnumbered three to one.”

“That’s one way to do the math,” Barron said. He snapped around the corner and put two shots into Shotgun’s chest as he started out of the vault. Fire from behind the cart went high as Barron took another shot at Grey, who was already ducking back into the vault. Barron ducked back out of the line of fire again as pistol shots pounded into the corner at his level. “Here’s another. A minute ago, you had me outnumbered five-to-one. At this rate, you have about 90 seconds to live.”

“You really think you can take all three of us?”

“If I were just another man, probably not,” Barron admitted. “But you’ve heard about these supers who have come out since the First String left?”

“Daddy, no,” Grace said at his side.

“I’m one of them.”

There was a moment of silence, then a derisive snort of laughter. “You’re a superhero? Then why are you shooting at us with a pistol instead of throwing fireballs or something.”

“Please stop,” Grace said.

“That’s not what my power is.”

“Then what is it?”

Barron looked at Grace and saw her pleading eyes as she said, “Don’t say it, Daddy, please.”

But of course, he had brought it up precisely so he could say it. Because he so rarely got to speak the truth that constantly fought to be spoken. The truth that had cost him so much in the three years since the world had changed. Looking Grace in the eye, he said, “I speak the language of God…”

“Don’t…”

“Which orders the universe and holds it together.”

“Damn it, Daddy, please stop,” Grace was crying again.

“I speak the language of numbers,” Barron finished.

There was another long pause, and then Grey’s voice said, “Wait, you mean math? Your superpower is math?”

But Barron barely heard him. He was too busy watching Grace walk quickly toward the exit doors, swiping away tears as she went. And though he dimly realized that his heart (what was left of it) was breaking to see her go, he was glad she would not be here to see the rest.

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Super Movie Monday – Kick Ass

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So we’re back. You may notice some differences in how some things display. I’m considering some changes, which would mean the plug-in I currently use for lightboxing would no longer work, so I’m going to be posting without the lightbox until I make a final decision.

Kick Ass is more recent than most of the films I cover, but I happened to have a borrowed copy, so I figured I’d use it while I had it. Based on the Marvel comic by Mark Millar and John Romita, Jr., Kick Ass tells the story of Dave Lizewski (Aaron Taylor-Johnson), an ordinary teenager who decides to try to make the world a better place by putting on a costume and fighting crime. Unfortunately, he has no special powers, special training, or even basic fighting ability, so things don’t turn out exactly as he hopes.

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Directed by Matthew Vaughn (who also directed X-Men: First Class, the last film I covered here), the film opens with a riff on Peter Parker’s narration in Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man, with Lizewski narrating as we meet him, his friends, and the girl of his dreams, Katie Deauxma. Dave is a big comics fan who wonders why no one has tried dressing up like superhero in real life before (answer: they have). But even though he isn’t even brave enough to talk to lonely rich kid Chris D’Amico (Christopher Mintz-Plasse), he decides to become a costumed hero after being mugged for the countless time while people watch silently through their windows. He orders a scuba suit, puts together a matching mask and goes out to practice fighting evil.

Of course, it’s mostly a fantasy lark until he runs into the same muggers who robbed him breaking into a car. He changes into his costume and confronts them, and it’s a glorious moment when he finally gets to strike back at the world that has oppressed him for so long.

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At least until he gets stabbed in the guts and stumbles into the path of a moving vehicle.

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Not an auspicious debut.

Meanwhile, we learn that lonely rich kid Chris D’Amico’s father Frank (Mark Strong) is a mob boss, and he’s got a problem. One of his low-level thugs has stolen a ton of coke while claiming that it was taken by a guy in a costume who may or may not have looked like Batman. Frank goes to the movies with Chris as his men kill the rat.

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One thing the movie does well is, even as it’s showing the hero to be vulnerable and virtually ineffectual, it also presents the bad guys as banal and ordinary, like when Frank’s telling one of his men to get him a Slushee while in the background, we hear screams of torture cut short by a gunshot. D’Amico’s an interesting character, far from a genius, but with a scary intensity when he needs it.

Meanwhile, we also meet Damon and Mindy Macready (Nicolas Cage and Chloe Grace-Moretz), a father and daughter who share some bonding time as Daddy shoots his little princess with a handgun to get her used to her bulletproof vest. Heartwarming.

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So Dave gets out of the hospital with a skeleton full of pins and metal and a bunch of dead nerve endings, meaning he barely feels pain anymore. Perfect for a superhero!

But even as he’s reassembling his costume and resuming his training, Dave is also dealing with his new girlfriend (sort of), Katie Deauxma. You see, Dave got the paramedics to throw away his bloody costume while he was being taken to the hospital, so he showed up at the hospital nude. So the rumor has gone around that he is gay, which has apparently made him much more attractive in Katie’s eyes.

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Dave decides to try the hero biz again, starting smaller this time. He finds a poster searching for a missing cat and decides to track it down. Along the way, he runs into a dude being chased by three thugs who proceed to beat him mercilessly. So Dave, who’s sick of seeing people stand by and watch while others get walked over, jumps in to fight while, um, a bunch of people stand by and watch.

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And not coincidentally, film the action on their cellphones, which turns Dave (calling himself Kick Ass) into a viral hit. Not only that, but Katie thinks Kick Ass is pretty cool and wonders if maybe she should contact him for help with an ex-boyfriend who won’t leave her alone. dave encourages her to do so, then dons his costume to give the ex a talking -to. Except it turns out that the ex is a drug dealer with a bunch of scary bodyguards. Dave is in way over his head, and on the verge of being stabbed again, when suddenly salvation shows up in the form of Hit Girl, who murders the entire gang (except for one bodyguard who’s taken out by a sniper shot from her father, Big Daddy, whose costume really does look like Batman).

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That creepy smile she gives Dave whenever she kills one of these goons is kinda terrifying, almost as terrifying as Big Daddy’s pseudo-Adam West voice and pimptastic mustache. But though Dave wonders about giving up the mask now that shit has gotten real, Kick Ass is still publicly popular.  The viral video is receiving endless airplay (and in a couple of shots, I could swear there are cameos by John Romita Jr., the artist of the original comic). And now, Frank D’Amico suspects that the Batman lookalike accused of stealing his drugs might in fact be Kick Ass, after what happened to Katie’s ex-boyfriend and his crew. He orders Kick Ass found and killed, but then, as coincidence would have it, Kick Ass walks right by his car in the middle of the afternoon. So Frank gets out to say hi.

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Kick Ass is dead. End of movie. Which is weird, because there’s still another hour to go. We’ll find out what that’s about next week.

 

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Out of the Vault – Shade, the Changing Man

Shade1CoverIn 1977, DC and Marvel were in dire straits. Rising costs for paper and printing were driving up costs even as readership seemed to be declining. Some people were predicting the end of the American comics industry. But DC had a plan.

That plan became known as the “DC Explosion.” Essentially, DC decided to try to drive up sales by releasing a bunch of new titles and increasing the number of story pages in each title, accompanied by a price increase. Some books stayed at 35 cents, but others went up to 50, and the company also introduced a line called Dollar Comics which are pretty self-explanatory. Among the new titles were Black Lightning, Steel: The Indestructible Man, Claw the Unconquered, Firestorm, the Nuclear Man, and Shade, the Changing Man (yes, whoever was in charge of titles needed to get out more).

Shade #1 came out in April or May of 1977, and it was not like anything else the company was doing at the time, although in another sense, it was.  Shade was the work of Steve Ditko, best known for being the original artist on Marvel’s The Amazing Spider-Man (and co-author as well; although he didn’t write the dialogue, there seems ample evidence that Ditko did most of the plotting on the book). The title was extra-unusual in that it played out like a superhero title, but it bore no connection to the greater DC Universe. Unlike, say, Firestorm, there were no early Superman or Batman cameos to try to drive sales. This was Ditko’s show all the way (although Michael Fleisher was credited with writing the dialogue).

The biggest similarity to other DC books was the fact that it was a distinctive work by one of the biggest names in the business. DC was doing a lot of that at the time, with oddball books by Joe Simon (co-creator of Captain America) and Joe Kubert, and Jack Kirby had only recently left DC and returned to Marvel as well.

The premise of the book was wacky: part science-fiction, part Doctor Strange. The book features two parallel universes, or “zones,” which certain people can travel between at will. The Earth Zone is our familiar world. However, the Meta Zone is a futuristic world populated by bizarre villains with fantastic powers provided by near-magical super-science and pursued by Science Police. Between the two zones lies the mysterious Zero Zone, with an Area of Madness that will destroy anyone foolish enough to enter.

Rac Shade, a disgraced former policeman (and the only known survivor of the Area of Madness), gets caught up in a mass breakout from a maximum security prison and ends up in the Zero Zone. Alone among the prisoners, he has a special implant which allows him to go to Earth, where he formerly worked as a secret agent. Once in his apartment, he dons the “illegal M-Vest” and sets out to clear his name. Turns out he was framed by his former boss, who had made himself a bit of a crimelord on Earth. So Shade tries to infiltrate the gang, and we get our first look at the M-Vest in action.

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The vest produces a a force field which not only protects Shade from harm, but also produces illusions based on the stress and fear of the people Shade is fighting. It doesn’t make a huge difference in the fights, but it looks cool as hell.

So for eight issues, Shade battled foes like The Form and The Cloak and Khaos, Lord of Destruction, all the while being pursued by Mellu, his former partner and lover. She bears a grudge against Shade.

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As the issues progress, Mellu begins to doubt Shade’s guilt, although she is still sworn to arrest him and let him be tried in court. Meanwhile, Shade is drawing closer to the conspiracy that had him framed, Meta’s dreaded Crime Council, headed by the bizarre Sude (or Supreme Decider).

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And in an ironic twist, it turns out that Sude is actually one of Mellu’s crippled parents. I say “ironic,” because rumor had it that the reason Ditko left Spider-Man was over a dispute about the Green Goblin’s identity (Ditko wanted it to be someone anonymous, unknown to the hero, because having it be someone he was well acquainted with was too much of a coincidence). Yet here was Ditko once again doing a story where the mysterious master villain was the parent of someone close to our hero (the Green Goblin story has since been debunked).

The final two issues featured an injured Shade trapped by his force field in something called the Color Coma, as we finally learned the full story of his origin. Meanwhile, the villainous Dr. Z.Z. had taken over Meta’s outpost on Earth and cut it off from Meta. With Z.Z. and his followers plotting a takeover of Earth and Shade’s M-Vest now the only means of traveling between the zones, Meta’s President offers to reopen Shade’s investigation and let him clear himself, in exchange for Shade stopping the bad doctor. As issue 8 ends, Shade takes off for Earth, and we are told that next issue will feature Shade “Trapped in the Zero-Zone!”

Which turned out to be prophetic. In fact, issue 9 was never released except as part of a photocopied “ash can” issue titled Cancelled Comic Cavalcade. Shade was cancelled along with over SIXTY other series in what came to be known as the “DC Implosion.” And I, for one, was disappointed. Although the book was kind of hokey and old-fashioned in an industry on the verge of huge changes, it was exciting and action-packed. I was surprised, when I went back to reread those old issues, at just how well the series still holds up, as opposed to, say, Chris Claremont’s X-Men, which I loved and which I now find almost unreadable.

But Shade, the Changing Man did make a comeback of sorts, in 1990, although he was greatly, um, changed. More on that next week.

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Metatronic: Prologue and Chapter 1

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PROLOGUE

It floated in the heavens in serene majesty, facing toward the light that was the center and purpose of its existence. It bathed in glorious effulgence. The scales of its wings fluttered in the golden radiance streaming past. And as it floated, it sang, and sent its song to Earth, translating the ineffable glories it witnessed into a crude cipher, a pale shadow for the benefit of those who could not comprehend its full glory.

For this was its only purpose: to bear witness to the glories above and sing to the people below. Even though they did not yet have ears to hear, still it sang. Soon, its time would come round at last. Soon, its song would be heard, its purpose fulfilled.

 

CHAPTER ONE

SIMPLE MATH

By the time Barron reached the front of the line, the teller had recognized him. She looked for a second as if she would refuse to call on him, but he had already let two other people go ahead of him to other tellers, and she knew how stubborn he could be. So in a voice that sounded as exhausted and hopeless as she could muster, she called, “Next.”

Hi, Grace,” he said when he reached her window. “You look good.”

“What are you doing here?” she asked tiredly.

“I wanted to see if you’re okay,” Barron said. “I’ve been worried.”

“Why would I not be okay?” she asked, although she looked as if she already knew she wouldn’t like the answer.

“I’ve just… I’ve been watching the bank’s financial data and I’ve seen some troubling fluctuations.”

She closed her eyes and shook her head. “Oh God, not numbers again. You did not seriously come to where I work to talk to me about numbers again.”

“You need to be careful, Grace,” Barron said. “Something bad is going to happen.”

“Yes,” she said loudly, and then quieter, “I’m going to get fired if you keep coming here and acting like this. I mean, seriously, what do you want from me?”

That pulled him up short for a moment. He had never really thought of their relationship in terms of want. “I just want you to be happy,” he said.

“You know what would make me happy?” she said. “If I had a different father, one who wasn’t bugfuck crazy. One who asked how I was because he cared about me, not because some numbers told him to.”

Barron struggled to find a reply to that. Things hadn’t been easy for Grace the last few years since losing her mother. And Barron knew that his own condition exacerbated the problem. Just when she needed him most, he had become someone else, a cold stranger obsessed with numbers and data, unable to find his way back into her heart. He could see the logic of her position, and even sympathize with it in an abstract way. It seemed like simple math: his love on one side, her need for love on the other. But he couldn’t seem to express that love in a way that made the equation balance. Worst of all, he couldn’t tell her how and why he had become this way, not without making her doubt his sanity even more.

But this was all beside the point. Somehow, the conversation had gotten twisted around to her anger at him, when it needed to be on the crisis coming. “Look, I know things between us aren’t the way either of us want. But I didn’t come here to embarrass you or fight with you. You need to be careful. The…”

“Is everything okay here?” asked a woman who had just stepped up to stand beside Grace. Older than Grace, more Barron’s age, wearing a sober black pants suit with a bright flowery scarf to remind people she was a woman or something. Her posture and the look on Grace’s face told him she was Grace’s boss. She turned to address Barron. “Do you have some bank business to transact?”

“I thought I did,” Barron said, and then he added in a louder voice, “I mean, I was thinking about opening an account with this bank, but I’ve been seeing some disturbing signs in the bank’s financial disclosures.”

“Okay, I’m going to stop you right there,” the woman said. “You need to step away from the window and stop harassing this woman, or else I’m going to call the guard over to have you removed from the premises. Do you understand?”

“But I’m not…”

“Do you understand me, yes or no?” the woman said, quietly but with much force. “Because I will not have this behavior in my bank.”

Barron thought to protest more–all of this talk about Grace’s feelings and the propriety of his behavior didn’t change the looming disaster he saw in the data by one digit–but Grace was giving him a look of such hurt and pleading. He’d never been good at interpreting what those looks meant, but it was pretty clear in this case. “I understand,” he said. “Be careful, Grace.”

He turned and started to walk away, hunched over, staring at his feet so he wouldn’t have to see people looking at him. He and Grace had been on this merry-go-round before, she being stubborn and people somehow judging him for it. He heard Grace’s boss behind him. “And let me just say that there is nothing wrong with the bank’s financials. Your money is still absolutely safe here.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t go that far,” said a voice by the door.

Barron looked up and saw men in masks, five of them, all armed. One stepped forward, raised his AK and sent a long burst into the ceiling, as the man next to him took down the guard with a blast from his shotgun. People screamed as the group moved forward and to either flank to herd everyone into a small group in front of the teller windows.

Barron’s eyes flicked from one man to the other as he moved back to join the group. They had gone to some pains to dress alike to hide any identifying features: all wore slate-colored jumpsuits with black stocking caps and blank plastic masks. But Barron immediately saw differences.

One of them held his pistol sideways like a gang-banger. He and the one with the AK seemed younger than the others, full of nervous energy and clueless about how to shoot. Hell, AK barely knew which end of the weapon to point. The one with the shotgun and the left-handed guy knew what they were doing. And then there was the one obviously calling the shots, who ironically had done the worst job putting on his cap. He hadn’t quite caught all the hair in back, so a fringe of grey showed underneath the cap.

Barron lay down on the floor with the rest of the customers as Grey pointed at Grace and her boss. “Those two.”

Lefty brought them out from behind the counter as Gang-banger stuffed cash from the drawers into a sack. “What do you want?” asked Grace’s boss, who must have also been the bank’s manager. “I’m willing to cooperate.”

Grey held out a sheet of paper. “You’re going to open these safe deposit boxes for me.”

The manager looked at the paper but didn’t take it. “I can’t do that.”

Grey grabbed Grace by the arm and pulled her to him. He shoved his pistol against her temple. “You will do it, or I will shoot this girl in the head so close to you that you will taste her blood.”

Barron’s eyes narrowed. His hands closed into fists on the floor, the only outward sign of the rage building inside him at these men who had just threatened his daughter. He wanted nothing more at that moment than to make Grey eat his own pistol, but once again, this was simple math: five armed men>one unarmed man. But if he could isolate one or two of them, the equation would change in a big way.

The manager drooped and nodded. “I’ll do it,” she said.

“All right, we don’t have much time,” Grey said. He shoved Grace aside and dragged the manager toward the vault entrance. Shotgun and Lefty followed him. As Gang-banger started to follow suit, Grey turned and pointed at him. “Not you. You two stay out here and watch them. And be ready to shoot her if this one decides not to cooperate.”

Gang-banger waved his sideways pistol at Grace and herded her over to the rest of the group.”Get down,” he said, then paced nervously halfway to the vault and came back. “You believe this shit? Like gettin’ stuck at the kids’ table.”

“Hey, we all gotta’ do our jobs, man,” AK said. “It ain’t nothin’ personal.”

“Unless you think he kept you two out here because he doesn’t want you to see what they’re getting,” Barron said.

Grace shushed him as Gang-banger walked over and held his pistol pointing down at Barron’s head. “Shut up! This has nothing to do with you! I will put a bullet in your brain!”

He thumped the barrel against Barron’s head for emphasis, then paced away again. “Do you think that’s what they’re doing?” Gang-banger asked AK. “I don’t remember them saying anything about safe deposit boxes before. Do you think they’re going to double-cross us on our cut?”

“He wouldn’t do that to me,” AK said.

“But what about me?” Gang-banger asked. “Am I gonna’ get screwed out of my cut? I’m gonna’ go find out.”

“We’re supposed to stay here,” AK said.

“Exactly!” Gang-banger shouted over his shoulder and disappeared around the corner where his co-conspirators had gone.

Barron stood up; he hadn’t expected them to make it quite this easy. He had taken about three steps toward the kid with the AK before the kid noticed. He spun and pointed the weapon roughly in Barron’s direction. “Back down on the floor, asshole!”

“Or what?” Barron asked as he advanced slowly. “You’ll shoot me? Hard to do with an empty weapon.”

“Empty? It’s not empty!”

“Yes, it is,” Barron said. “You put every round you had in the ceiling.”

“Like you would know that.”

“It’s simple math,” Barron said. “That magazine holds thirty rounds; there’s thirty bullet holes in the ceiling. QED.”

The kid glanced up and Barron sprang forward, wrenching the weapon from the kid’s grip with one hand while hitting him in the throat with the other. He went down, gagging.

Grace leapt to her feet. “Are you crazy?”

Barron quickly shushed the commotion that started to rise from the assembled customers and employees. “Everyone get outside,” he said. “I’ll keep them trapped in the vault.”

“What are you going to do?” Grace asked.

Barron rejected the first answer that came to mind and said, simply, “Stop them.”

“And how are you going to do that with an empty rifle?”

“Yeah,” asked another voice. Barron looked to his right and saw Gang-banger aiming his sideways pistol. “I’d like to know that one, too.”

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Trailer Time: Metatronic

So I’ve been blocked and preoccupied and sick and what have you, but I promised I’d be back with something new on or about May 1st. It’s not looking like I’ll actually have the first chapter ready and the new graphics fully polished by then, so I’m going to give you this teaser now and set a firm launch date of May 8. The new rotation, therefore, will be: Super Movie Monday on Monday, Out of the Vault on Saturday, and in between, on Wednesday, the new novel: Metatronic.

As I did with Run, Digger, Run!, here’s a movie trailer-style teaser of what’s to come (format totally stolen from Sargon and Naamah of Adventurotica)…

 

FADE IN:

A man and a woman sit across from each other in a coffee shop. The man is ruggedly handsome, in his 40’s, but there is an undefinable coldness about him. The woman is pretty, but severe, in a blue business outfit with short, dirty-blonde hair. He is BARRON, and she is ISOBEL.

 

 ISOBEL

So, Mister Barron, what exactly do you do?

 CUT TO:

Barron holding a pistol, huddled behind a metal cart in what looks like a bank vault. He speaks loudly past the cart he’s sheltering behind.

 BARRON

I speak the language of God, which orders the universe and holds it together. I speak the language of numbers.

 Behind an upturned table, two thugs have also taken cover. They hold submachine guns. The HEAD THUG can barely contain his laughter.

HEAD THUG

Wait, you mean math? Your superpower is math?!

 CUT TO:

Barron in the coffee shop.

 

 BARRON

I work with data.

 Isobel smiles skeptically.

ISOBEL

That must be awfully dull. I mean, I’ve read your jacket. Security consultant, special forces operator, combat veteran…

 CUT TO:

Barron running frantically through a darkened street, lit by random fires. Something rises up before him. We only get a brief glimpse, but it looks vaguely like an angel, humanoid, winged and white with gleaming armor. But there’s something disquieting about its eyeless face. Barron empties his pistol into the thing to no effect.

CUT TO:

Barron sipping his coffee.

BARRON

That was a long time ago.

 ISOBEL

But stopping that bank robbery wasn’t.

 CUT TO:

The Head Thug in the bank vault still barely containing his laughter. The thug beside him is smiling also.

 

HEAD THUG

What the hell kind of superpower is math?

 A SHOT rings out, followed by the ZINGS of ricochets. The second thug stiffens, and his eyes go wide in shock right before he collapses. The Head Thug looks down at him in confusion.

BARRON”S VOICE

Well, there’s geometry, for starters.

 CUT TO:

Barron sets down his cup.

 BARRON

What exactly do you want from me, Miss Crisostomo?

 Isobel shrugs and sets down her cup as well.

 

 ISOBEL

To offer you a job. I’m setting up a small elite task force. I obviously can’t tell you the details until you’re read on, but it’s not a super major deal. We should wrap it up in three weeks, max.

 CUT TO:

 

A QUICK MONTAGE of action shots:

Barron firing a pistol…

Isobel firing an assault rifle as she charges down a hallway…

Barron fighting another man hand to hand…

A large dump truck crashes through a police barricade…

Barron leaps for cover as something explodes close by…

Masked men in a bank lobby fire machine guns at the ceiling as customers duck for cover…

Barron writes something on the palm of his hand…

Isobel, light shining on her face, looks at something in amazement…

Reverse angle as another angel, smaller and more futuristic-looking than the previous one, turns to look at her, neon lights winking in odd places on his body…

The dump truck from earlier, joined by other trucks, bumps at high speed across a field. A tarp tears away and what looks like angels rise from the back…

Barron continues to write on his palm as we revolve around him, closer…

In a darkened apartment, Barron helps a sexy woman off with her dress. From his point of view, her skin crawls with numbers…

Gleaming winged figures streak across a sky covered with boiling clouds…

A demonic figure that looks as if it’s cut from obsidian lands heavily on the ground, not far from a giant man in medieval Japanese peasant garb. The giant turns and lightning erupts from his mouth…

People on an airplane scream as the craft literally disintegrates around them…

Barron stops writing on his palm and whispers at the figure he has inscribed there. Then he thrusts his hand out and something explodes from it, tearing a steel door off its hinges.

FLASH CUT to black screen and the title…

[imageeffect type=”lightbox” align=”aligncenter” width=”600″ height=”245″ alt=”Metatronic Coming Soon!” url=”https://www.herogohome.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/MetatronicTeaser.jpg” ]

In the coffee shop, Isobel stands up and begins to walk away.

 

ISOBEL

Give me a call when you decide.

 

 

BARRON

Shouldn’t you give me your number?

 

 

ISOBEL

My card is already in your wallet. I gave it to you the first time we had this conversation, ten minutes ago.

 

Barron looks confused. Isobel smiles mysteriously.

 

ISOBEL

You’re not the only one who’s different.

 

CUT TO BLACK

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From Partial to Total

Hiatus

So I’ve been on a partial hiatus since before Halloween, maintaining the Super Movie Monday and Out of the Vault features without writing any of the fiction that was supposed to be the whole point of the site. Well, that’s all going to change. Starting, um, a few days ago, actually, I’m on official hiatus for the month of April. No comics, no movies. There may be one more YouTube video, but that’s it for the month.

But never fear, because Hero Go Home will be back in force on or around May 1, with a new look and fresh content, including (I really, really hope) a new novel launching. But this will be different from what you’re used to on this site, and if I can pull together all the ideas I have for it, it could end up being pretty cool. I’ve also made some behind the scenes changes as well, upgrading the hardware and software that go into putting the site together. I hope that the results will justify the effort and expense.

So don’t cry, and keep your eyes open next month, because things are going to get dark.

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Super Movie Monday – X-Men: First Class, Part 3

Here it is, the final chapter of the final (so far) movie of 20th Century Fox’s X-Men series. Last week, evil mutant Sebastian Shaw had manipulated the U.S. and the Soviet Union into a confrontation off the coast of Cuba in a bid to set off a nuclear war between the two superpowers. Meanwhile, Professor Charles Xavier and Erik Lensherr, along with C.I.A. agent Moira McTaggart, recruited and trained a team of mutants to stop Shaw.

Before the big event (and just after Hank McCoy’s botched attempt to normalize his appearance), Eric returns to his room to find Raven waiting in his bed. He tells her she’s too young, so she changes herself to look older, and we get another cameo from Rebecca Romijn as an older human Raven.

I’m not sure if Romijn had gained weight or if they digitally widened her face to make a closer match to Jennifer Lawrence’s round features, but she doesn’t look like her earlier appearances. Eric tells her he prefers “the real Raven,” i,e, the blue one.

Raven then confronts Charles about his insistence that she hide her true self, saying “I always thought it was going to be you and me against the world, but you don’t want to be against the world.” It sounds more like adolescent drama than a prescription for living, but if you’re watching X-Men movies to learn how to live, you’re kinda screwed to start with.

The next morning, they find Hank’s lab trashed and a crate marked X containing special flight suits that–surprise,surprise–look a lot like the original X-Men’s uniforms.

And Hank appears, only the serum, instead of curing his deformity, has enhanced it.

And this… I know why they did it, basically. At this point in the comics, Beast had been redesigned by Frank Quitely to have a more cat-like feel, and so they apparently decided to keep pace with that in the movie. But something about it–the bright blue fur, the big eyes–doesn’t quite work. It has a cute look that doesn’t match the aesthetic of the other X-Men movies, but also doesn’t match the 60’s spy movie vibe they play off of for much of the rest of the movie.

So now comes the big confrontation near Cuba, as the Russian and U.S. fleets square off on either side of the cargo ship bearing the first nuclear missiles bound for Cuba. The Russians receive orders for the ship to turn around, but the crew can’t obey, since they’re currently dead. Azazel is piloting the ship.

And here comes the secret plane! Xavier telepathically orders the Russian political officer to fire on the cargo ship, thereby stopping the shipment and preventing war.

But Shaw has other plans. He decides to absorb the power of his sub’s nuclear reactor and use that power to strike against the two fleets, which will spark the all-out war he seeks. Good plan, if not for the fact that Banshee has used his sonic screams to locate the sub and Magneto is using his newly-buffed power to lift it out of the water.

And on the one hand, it’s a really impressive moment with wonderful effects. But it has been so meticulously set up that there’s no real suspense to it (even less since it was spoiled in the trailers). It feels kind of obligatory.

Until Riptide uses his power to knock the X-plane out of the sky, causing both sub and plane to crash on a nearby island. The final fight is on!

Beast, Havok and Banshee square off against Angel, Riptide and Azazel, while Magneto enters the sub to find Shaw. Xavier can stop him, but not while he’s wearing the telepathy-blocking helmet.

I’ve got to say, I really like the flying sequences in the finale. They match the lighting beautifully on the live-action plates for some of Banshee’s process shots, while others, like this aerial chase, look like they’re literally just hanging them from helicopters and choreographing them on location, which is brilliant.

Meanwhile, Magneto confronts Shaw, but even though he is much more powerful than he was before, Erik is no match for Shaw’s nuclear-enhanced strength.

Unfortunately for Shaw, as he’s gloating about his final victory, Erik steals the helmet off his head, allowing Charles to freeze him in place. Unfortunately for Charles, Erik uses the opportunity to put the helmet on himself, so that Charles can’t stop him from killing Shaw with the coin he gave Erik all those years ago in the concentration camp. And Charles doesn’t dare release Shaw to protect himself, lest Shaw take the opportunity to start World War III. He can only view it through Shaw’s mind at a distance.

It’s a great scene, echoing the beginning, with Fassbender’s performance and parallel camera moves between Shaw and Xavier, and Henry Jackman’s pulsing revenge theme on the soundtrack. It’s almost too bad the movie can’t end there.

But of course, the two navies sitting off the coast watching this whole fight decide (at the urging of Major Stryker, mutant-hater that he is) to end the mutant threat once and for all by shelling the beach. Good plan, if there weren’t an incredibly powerful mutant whose specialty is controlling metal.

Magneto sends the shells and missiles back at the ships, but Charles launches into a fistfight to try and stop him, joined by Moira, who tries to shoot him. Magneto deflects the bullets easily. Oops.

Once again, completely incompatible with the timeline as shown in the other films, but then, it saves us from the nightmare of a digitally-smoothed Patrick Stewart, so yay, I guess.

Magneto gives a big “join me” speech and is joined by Shaw’s former teammates, plus Raven, of course. I don’t quite buy it, but we’re at the end and it gives us something that actually ties in to the other films, so I’ll accept it. Funny thing, though; having Mystique run off with a group including Azazel in 1962 means they could really be Nightcrawler’s parents.

Even though Charles is wheelchair-bound for the rest of his life, he decides to turn his temporary training academy into a full-fledged school for mutants. He erases Moira’s memory and sends her back to the C.I.A., where Magneto is busting Emma Frost out of confinement. And he is not only wearing his familiar red outfit, but has also modified the helmet to look like the classic original  Kirby design, down to the goofy doodad on his forehead.

In the end, I’m torn on the film. I like some of the scripting touches, I like the design aesthetics (with the exception of Beast’s redesign, which doesn’t completely work for me), I love the music and the performances by McAvoy and Fassbender. Director Vaughan includes some beautiful stylistic flourishes.

But I don’t like some of the supporting performances or the haphazard mix-and-match feel of the comics elements. The Hank/Raven “Mutant and Proud” character arc doesn’t work well and takes focus away from the relationship between Charles and Moira, which is too bad, since Rose Byrne gives the best female performance in the film.

I may take a week or so break before the next film. I’m hoping to post another video soon and want to use the time working on it instead.

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Rare Find: Ditko Public Health Pamphlet from 1992!

Okay, so here’s the deal. It just so happens that, while researching for Out of the Vault, I found out that a prominent comics professional’s papers were being held in a special collection at a local university. So I went by and looked through the stuff, and found this amazing document.

Apparently, someone working in the office of Surgeon General Antonio Novella in 1992 decided it would be a good idea to educate young teens on safer sex practices with a pamphlet produced by a famous comics artist. Unfortunately, that famous comics artist was Steve Ditko, so the message turned out a little skewed.

The four-page story concerns high schoolers Alex and Melissa, who after a bout of underage drinking, end up having sex. Some time later, Melissa volunteers to donate blood at a high school blood drive, but when they test her blood, they discover she has HIV.

I wasn’t supposed to photograph or copy anything in the collection, but I couldn’t pass this up, so through a series of clever maneuvers, scared to death I was going to get caught any second, I managed to get a quick scan of just the last page.

Not actually a real pamphlet by Steve Ditko

Apparently, someone actually let this get out the door before they realized that its incredibly severe abstinence-only message risked making the entire department look foolish. They recalled the pamphlets, but inevitably some escaped. And I was one of the lucky few who got to hold the actual item in my hands.

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Out of the Vault – The New Wave

In 1986, Eclipse Comics was one of a few rising comics companies trying to make the leap from independent to major player. Marvel and DC were still dominating the market, of course, but Comico, First and Eclipse were all vying for market share just underneath them.

Eclipse, having just made a big splash with the revival of Alan Moore’s Marvelman (published in America under the title Miracleman) decided to take the next step by publishing books in their own company universe. They had acquired the rights to the Golden Age Hillman stable of characters, including Airboy, Skywolf, and the Heap, but they also decided to introduce their own superhero team to cash in on the popularity of the X-Men. Eclipse’s new team was called The New Wave.

The were introduced in a special preview section that appeared The New DNAgents #9 and Miracleman #8, in which they met the Heap in a swamp, having just crashed to Earth in a space shuttle. Either the same week or the week after, their first issue was released, which began the backstory of how they got into that shuttle in the first place. Like Airboy, the big gimmick was that it came out in 16-page issues every two weeks (cover price 50 cents) instead of one 32-page book every month.

The story began with a group of scientists on a space station, conducting some sort of experiment to transport matter from another dimension or something. but they didn’t get what they bargained for.

Turns out this whole thing was set up by evil corporate exec Pasternak for undisclosed purposes. The alien being, named Tachyon by the humans, escapes the space station, killing a few people in the process, but then gets lonely and comes back. And meanwhile, Pasternak has kidnapped teenage Elizabeth (daughter of project scientist James Holmes) to keep him in line. Only it also turns out that Elizabeth’s mother was a superhero, and Elizabeth’s teenage boyfriend is telekinetic and meanwhile, there’s this super-powered secret agent named Dot who has infiltrated the station, along with a circus acrobat (she has a stunt pole-vaulting act) named Polestar.

The series had some interesting ideas and some fun character byplay, but suffered from some deadly flaws. Scripter Mindy Newell had never really written an ongoing series before, and it showed. The reasoning behind the experiment that summoned Tachyon was never really explained, nor was the deadly countdown that our heroes had to stop. It was “the end of the world,” but we never knew how that was supposed to work, exactly.

Also, major scenes would be skipped over. That costume that Impulse is wearing in the last panel? We never find out where it came from, why he’s wearing it, or why he suddenly starts getting referred to as Impulse instead of Daniel. It just happens and we’re supposed to roll with it.

The art by Lee Weeks and Ty Templeton varied from solid, but uninspiring, to cluttered and awkward. Both have moved on to bigger and better things, but they were still pretty much brand-new here, and their inexperience showed.

After issue 8, Eclipse canned the bi-weekly format and moved to a normal monthly schedule with their regular price, but it didn’t help. The New Wave folded after 13 issues; I gave up after 8. The series had some interesting ideas, but just never found its groove.

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Super Movie Monday – X-Men First Class, Part 2

Sorry this is late, but, you know (ETA: Wow, so lateness is not an excuse for not proofreading, apparently; corrections added throughout).

Continuing our look back at the final (so far) film in 20th Century Fox’s X-Men series, X-Men First Class. When we left off, young Professor Charles Xavier and mutant master of magnetism Eric Lensherr had found common cause in stopping Nazi-torture-doctor-turned-Swinging-Sixties-supervillain Sebastian Shaw.

The man in black, whom I shall refer to as Fred (because I think his character is supposed to be Fred Duncan), takes the three mutants to his secret facility in Langley, Virginia. There, they meet Hank McCoy who is introduced as he talks about the plane he has designed, and his hand is moving restlessly in his pocket. It looks like he’s playing with himself.

Charles is thrilled to find another mutant, which is news to Hank’s boss. Hank keeps his mutation a secret, because it’s embarrassing. His feet are like hands. Monkey feet, if you will.

Raven is impressed. You know what they say about guys with thumbs on their feet.

Meanwhile, Shaw is thrilled with the escalation in tensions between U.S. and Soviets and is on his way to Russia to crank things up a bit more. He demonstrates a helmet the Russians made him that can block thoughts, which we all recognize as Magneto’s helmet. He also indulges in a little male chauvinist power trip, just because it’s the 60’s and he can.

Back in the top secret facility, Hank and Raven are getting romantic over Hank’s plan to make a serum that will cure their mutant appearance “without affecting abilities.” And I can see how Raven could still be a shapeshifter without her blue base form, but the only power of Hank’s we’ve seen is his ability to hang by his feet, because his feet work like hands. There’s no real way to make them look normal and still function the same way.

Erik interrupts with the cock block by saying Raven is perfect the way she is. Then he steals Shaw’s C.I.A. file and starts to leave, but Charles talks him into staying (and mentions that the yacht battle was only yesterday? things happen fast in movies).

The next day, their CIA sponsor shows them a special telepathy enhancing computer Hank has designed, named Cerebro of course. This changes the previous movies’ assertion that Magneto helped build Cerebro, but by now it should already be apparent that this movie has no interest in being an authentic prequel. More on that in a sec.

So now Charles uses Cerebro to find other mutants, whom he and Erik will then go and recruit. Cue the montage with the 60’s-style pop groove. Angel the Exotic Dancer! Darwin the Cab Driver!  Convict Alex Summers! The Red-Headed Guy Whose Picture They Showed Rupert Grint When He Asked for More Money! This is the by-now-standard X-movie grab-bag of old and new characters, and I don’t mind, except for Alex a bit.

See, in the comics, Alex Summers was Scott Summers’s younger brother, but in this movie, he’s obviously way older than Scott, around the same age as Charles Xavier. Which would make him Scott’s, what, father? Much older brother? Totally unrelated guy whose name just happens to be Summers and who just happens to have a crimson energy power?

And of course, because you’ve gotta have Wolverine in there, Jackman shows up in a brief cameo refusing to be recruited (this takes the place of the usual Stan Lee cameo, because there’s not one). McAvoy can barely keep from laughing.

And it’s that last bit, along with Mystique’s design, that kind of bugs me. I mean, I can understand and respect wanting to do your own thing and not be bound by the earlier movies’ continuity, but then they try to have it both ways by working in references to the other movies. If you’re going to do your own thing, then own it.

On Shaw’s submarine, Emma Frost tells Shaw that she can feel Xavier’s mind and it has been unnaturally amplified somehow. She deduces that they are recruiting. Shaw sends her on to Russia and says he’ll take care of Xavier.

Back at Langley, we finally get to see a demonstration of the new mutants’ powers as they get drunk and bond through destroying their quarters. Mystique also comes up with the idea of giving them all code names, because they’re secret agents now.

Charles argues for taking the new mutants along with them to stop Shaw in Russia, but the drunken party quells that. So Charles, Eric and Moira head to Russia with a squad of soldiers. When they discover Shaw has missed the meet, Moira decides to abort the mission, but Eric charges in to confront Emma. Charles pursues.

Emma shifts to diamond form, which makes her mental defenses impenetrable, but Magneto (so named by Raven) wraps her up in a metal bedframe and squeezes her neck so hard, it cracks. She has to shift to human form to keep her head attached.

The filmmakers do a better job of depicting Emma’s diamond form here than the people doing the Wolverine movie did. Still, those human eyes in that faceted body are disturbing. Also, although the script tries to make Emma confident and smart, January Jones’s performance is awfully wooden for someone so soft and curvy.

Charles finds out that Shaw’s plan is to provoke a global thermonuclear war between the U.S. and the Soviet Union, destroying or mutating humanity while making mutants stronger.

Back at Langley, meanwhile, Shaw, Azazel and the third guy (the credits call him Riptide) attack the facility. Even though Azazel doesn’t have any lines, he’s a striking presence and I like the way he teleports in a burst of flame (the way Nightcrawler supposedly teleported in the comics).

He's a bad-ass

Shaw intends to kill Xavier, but he has to settle for recruiting the kids instead. Angel, who wasn’t really loving the C.I.A. in the first place, immediately defects to his side, because the bad guys are much sharper dressers. Darwin defects also, but it’s actually a ruse to protect Angel while Havok blasts them. Too bad one of the bad guys can absorb energy blasts and then use their power to kill his enemies. Say, Darwin.

And there are a lot things to say about this particular moment. On the one hand, it’s obviously a naked ploy to shock the audience, but its impact is diminished by the fact that we don’t know any of these new faces well enough to really care if they die. But then there’s the unfortunate fact that he’s the only black guy in the movie; not the token black hero, but literally like the only black guy you ever see on the screen (the only other non-white character is Angel (the exotic Zoe Kravitz) who turns bad).

But he’s also the guy who emerges in the brief scenes we’re shown as the natural leader of the new group (aside from Charles and Eric). In the attack sequence, he’s the only one of the new mutants who shows any initiative or courage, which maybe they were hoping would insulate them from charges of racism when they killed him off.

So Shaw convinces the Russian general to put missiles in Cuba, while back in the U.S., Charles decides to take the mutants to his place, where they can have a training montage!

Not the Luthor mansion this time, I’m afraid. And so, Charles teaches Eric to move mighty large things and teaches Hank to unleash his inner animal. And I like the way McAvoy as Xavier really seems to get a kick out of helping the others achieve success. With the help of Hank’s gadgets, Professor X also teaches Banshee how to fly using his sonic screams for lift (although the bit about sounds having to go “supersonic” seems a little, um, impossible)…

And Havok to control his powers using a costume that approximates what he wore in the comics.

So now they’re ready for the final confrontation, except for one thing. Hank has  finished his mutant appearance-correcting serum and offers it to Raven. However, she has been swayed by Eric to believe she wants to stay blue, and so she declines, at which Hank turns total douchebag and says her natural form will never be considered beautiful.

So Hank goes back to his lab and tries the formula on himself, alone. And since we namechecked Dr. Jekyll earlier during the training montage, we know what’ll happen.

See you next week for the big finale.

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